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Household Names

by | 24th, July 2002

‘IT’S midnight on day nine hundred and twenty-seven in OK!’s tribute to Big Brother.

The original Dwight dwelling

Housemates Elton and David are sitting in Woodside, a sprawling mansion on the outskirts of Windsor. David is wearing Elton’s red hair. Elton is wearing a smile.

David has asked Elton to show him pictures of the house where he grew up in Pinner, Middlesex. Elton produces a photograph of a ‘modest’ white and red painted house. There is a burgundy saloon car in the driveway and a bus stop outside…

It’s 1.17am, and Geraldine Estelle Halliwell is watching videos of herself performing It’s Rainin’ Men in the lounge of her £3.7 million mansion in Middle Green, Berkshire.

She’s also looking at a brochure of her new house, a £3million place in the Notting Hill area of London. The house is surrounded by a seven-foot wall, a moat and twelve crocodiles…

It’s now 2am and 15 seconds: Chris Evans and his much younger wife Billie are talking about schools at their Tudor pile in leafy Surrey. Chris is showing Billie a photo of his old house in Warrington. It’s got stone claddin’ and a door made from wood. The windows are glass…

It’s now 6.22am, and David and Victoria are already up in the house. David was born in Leytonstone in 1975, and Victoria grew up in the ‘picture-perfect’ surroundings of Goffs Oak, Hertfordshire.

The couple are talkin’ in the lounge of their £3.5 million seven-bedroom Grade II listed house in Sawbridgeworth, Hertfordshire. Victoria has eaten two Twiglets, a packet of Pickled Onion Monster Munch and seven boiled eggs. David has drunk eight glasses of water…

It’s now 9.15 and seven seconds. Liz Hurley is reading Forbes magazine…(continue forever)’



Posted: 24th, July 2002 | In: Reviews Comment | TrackBack | Permalink