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Anorak News | Cell By Date

Cell By Date

by | 18th, September 2003

‘CRIME doesn’t pay. Just ask Alan Hunt, who found himself clapped in irons after overstepping the boundaries of legality while taking part in an identity parade.

Police deny any bias against brown, black or other coloured breads

Hunt, 36, is a resting actor, but his role that fateful day was to play the role of the errant fool.

While waiting at the police station in Bournemouth, he took a cheese sandwich from a shelf and shared it with fellow line-up members.

Unfortunately, the sandwich belonged to PC Chris Biggs, who quite rightly dismissed the hapless thespian’s offer of a compensatory baguette, and promptly arrested him.

Hunt’s £10 fee was withheld and he spent more than eight hours in a cell.

He was then brought before the beak and accused of stealing the lunchbox, which also contained a nectarine, an apple and a small cake.

Justice took its course, and Hunt was ordered to pay £25 towards the prosecution costs, leaving him somewhat disgruntled. “I’m a 16-stone bloke and I’d had no breakfast and no lunch and I was starving,” he said.

Never mind. If he carries on losing weight at this rate, he’ll soon be able to squeeze into one of those slinky little black numbers that are so popular with our beefy fighting men.’



Posted: 18th, September 2003 | In: Broadsheets Comment | TrackBack | Permalink