Thighs The Limit

‘HUMBUGS all round to the staff at Peterborough’s Orton Centre where a disabled 12-year-old girl has been told she can’t bring her wheelchair into Santa’s Grotto in case it damages the floor.

”And get that spotty kid out of my grotto as well”

Young Danielle Axam can either be carried into Santa’s den or find an evangelist to cast out the evil spirit that lives within her and walk.

It’s a pretty fair deal, but it doesn’t stop Danielle’s mum, telling the Telegraph how she couldn’t believe it and that all disabled children should have the same rights as their able-bodied kin.

That’s all well and good but, if Mrs Axam would like to cast her eyes at the rest of the line outside Santa’s Grotto, she might begin to feel less sorry for her daughter and more fearful for dear old Claus and his helpers.

The Guardian has seen the report Adolescent Health, published by the British Medical Association, and has learnt that one in five kids between 13 and 16 is overweight or obese.

The paper also learns that 11% of children aged between 11 and 15 in England used drugs in the past year, 4% of which were Class A drugs, and one in five adolescents may have psychological problems.

On the brighter side, such findings will save Santa asking the time-honoured question ”What do you want of Christmas”, given that a joint will usually do.

On the downside, it could mean that the old boy’s knees begin to fail, perhaps even shatter, and his mind becomes unhinged by recalling the painful memories of when he was a portly child.’

Posted: 9th, December 2003 | In: Broadsheets Comment | TrackBack | Permalink