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Plumb Pudding

by | 16th, January 2004

‘NEW character Charlie Stubbs is quickly becoming a hit with the ladies. Well, specifically ladies of a ‘certain age’.

‘I’m an expert at servicing old boilers’

Like the character Jason in ‘Little Briton’ who fancies his mate’s grandmother, Charlie seems to have an unhealthy interest in old women – first he was flirting with Deirdre and now he’s moved onto Bev.

Charlie took Bev out for lunch at the Weatherfield Arms, but it was a different sort of filling Bev was after. Perhaps it’s her age (knowing she’s not got much longer to go) that makes our Bev not exactly backward at coming forward.

“So, are you going to take me back to yours now?” she breathed in his ear. And Charlie, being a builder by nature, simply can’t resist an opportunity to delve into an old property, however saggy the foundations.

Bev’s set for a fall, however, as Charlie later makes it clear that it was strictly a ‘one off’ and not to be repeated. There’s only so much charity work that a busy man can fit in.

Another disastrous coupling that’s about to come apart at the seams is poor Sarah Lou and Todd’s. Sarah Lou is completely oblivious to the fact that she’s engaged to a homosexual and is happily planning her wedding and pregnancy.

Todd’s mother Eileen is vehemently opposed to the marriage (well, they say a mother always ‘knows’ don’t they?).

“I won’t stand by and let you throw yer life away,” she screamed at him. It’ll be interesting to see if shacking up with a gay nurse falls under the ‘throwing your life away’ category too.

Weatherfield’s worst mum has hit upon a new money-making scheme. Having lost her job at the Weatherfield Arms and preferring to sit on her not inconsiderable bottom than work, she’s decided a life of crime is the way forward.

Chesney, her scarily ginger son was caught by Rita stealing sweets from The Cabin. Rita, being one the Daily Mail old guard, decided to mete out her own form of justice and clipped him round the ear.

Probably owing to the fact that Chesney has nothing in his empty little head, a slight shove sent him tumbling to the floor, resulting in a slight bump on the head.

Cilla, who clearly spends a lot of time watching daytime TV and therefore knows the number of Claims Direct, has suddenly seen pound signs in front of her eyes.

She marched Chesney to Weatherfield police station and made a formal complaint against Rita, a complaint Cilla goes on to tell her she’ll happily drop in return for some money.

Hopefully Cilla has met her match in Rita, however: the law of the jungle states that you never take on anyone more ginger than yourself.’



Posted: 16th, January 2004 | In: Strange But True Comment | TrackBack | Permalink