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Anorak News | We Were Disciples

We Were Disciples

by | 26th, February 2004

‘“I’M expecting a world-changing experience,” said Cindy Hawkswell, one of thousands of fundamentalist Christians who queued up on Ash Wednesday to see the opening of Mel Gibson’s new Jesus biopic, The Passion.

‘Just my ruddy luck to sit behind him…’

She was also expecting popcorn, an enormous vat of coke and a seat that though big enough to take the fulsome American buttock was both snug and reassuring.

And verily it came to pass that Cindy and others like her took their seats and waited for the action to begin.

But the Telegraph’s man in the congregation hears little rustling of sweet wrappers and munching of nachos and notices how quiet the audience was throughout the show.

But the time the movie finished and the audience had stepped outside Cindy and her likeminded cohorts were ready to hug each other. A few even began to pray.

Say what you like about turning a religious holiday into a movie-going marketing opportunity, but very few get the urge to give thanks to God after seeing seasonal Christmas fair.

But, then, however painful the likes of How The Grinch Stole Christmas and Jingle All The Way are, they do not stun their devout audience into submission with what the Los Angeles Times’ critic calls “sadistic violence”, an opinion related in the Guardian.

“When I think of my petty resentments they are incredibly insignificant,” says one movie goer between tears. “I am overwhelmed that He could do that for me.”

But Mel Gibson is used to such praise, though if you really want to thank him you can buy an official The Passion nail and hammer set, the bedtime shroud and flannel or tickets to The Passion II: The Revenge, starring Sly Stallone as Jesus H. Christ.’



Posted: 26th, February 2004 | In: Broadsheets Comment | TrackBack | Permalink