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Anorak | The Duel In The ‘Pool

The Duel In The ‘Pool

by | 31st, March 2004

‘ANOTHER day, another chapter in the Rooney-McCloughlin feud.

Mr McCloughlin wins in Round 8

Today, young Wayne reflects, via the pages of the Daily Star, upon his heartbreak as he watched his ‘beautiful’ fiancée Colleen in tears at the day that was supposed to be perfect.

(By the way, the word ‘beautiful’ is in inverted commas in the paper itself and we can’t help wondering whether this indicates Wayne’s own comments, or something more sarcastic on the part of the Star.)

Anyway, talking of Wayne’s own words, the lad seems to have blossomed from being a monosyllabic wallflower into a man who speaks fluent tabloidese.

‘I was so heartbroken that I cried,’ he said. ‘Now faceless people are feeding speculation that the family are at war.’

And here, right on cue, comes the Sun, shouting at the top of its voice like a drunken party guest.

‘I’LL HAVE ROO!’ it yells. ‘Wayne dad ends feud with boxing bout.’

It transpires that Wayne and Colleen’s fathers (both former boxers) will don their XXL trunks

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Posted: 31st, March 2004 | In: Tabloids Comment | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed: RSS 2.0 | TrackBack | Permalink