Anorak | Surf’s Up

Surf’s Up

by | 26th, April 2004

‘HAVE you ever wondered what those promised virgins who wait in heaven for suicide bombers look like?

Iron your stomach to flatness

We would like to remind anyone reading this with a bomb tied around their middle that Ann Widdecombe is a virgin, and the thought of 70-odd women like her falling upon your priapic soul should make you reconsider.

But different strokes turn on different folks. Before detonation, the image of a naked and beckoning Widdecombe might be what keeps the suicide bomber from stopping in their tracks.

But earth has its own pleasures. And we commend your attention to Michelle McManus, winner of TV’s Pop Idol talent show.

“MICHELLE MAKES WAVES,” says the Sun on its cover. “SEA ‘CHELLE,” puns the Mirror, adding, “Well you couldn’t really miss her…”

The paper then employs its entire annual humour budget in one mighty gag.

Alongside its shot of McManus in her swimsuit frolicking in the surf, it writes “PS: LUNCH HAS

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Posted: 26th, April 2004 | In: Tabloids Comment | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed: RSS 2.0 | TrackBack | Permalink