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Anorak | Battle Of The Bulge

Battle Of The Bulge

by | 8th, November 2004

‘WHILE the doomsayers at the Guardian talk about “Suicide attack in Falluja countdown” just stopping short of comparing the Black Watch’s impending attack on the Iraqi city to some kind of modern day Charge of the Light Brigade the Telegraph wonders about the British soldiers’ wellbeing.

The American ration packs were the envy of the British Army

Looking at the pale and spotty complexions of a typical new recruit to the British Army, the paper thinks that any future invasions will be less a charge than a breathless shambling stroll with breaks for junk food, video games and fags.

So, new recruits to the Armed Forces will be given a booklet called Recruit’s Guide to Nutrition, in which the Ministry of Defence will instruct them how to eat.

The chefs who work the canteen will move the chips to the furthest end of the food counter, offering them only once the fighting men and women

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