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Anorak | It’s Christmas Time

It’s Christmas Time

by | 15th, November 2004

‘“IT’S Christmas time, there’s no need to be afraid,” sings popstar Chris Martin in mid-November.

Forecasters are predicting another Christmas without snow in Africa

And he’s not alone in believing the holiday season is already upon us because the Sun has “the full exclusive story and pictures of the Christmas No.1”.

In its front-page story, “BAND OF HOPE”, the paper tells readers that even before Cliff Richard has pulled on his leather cassock and Noel Edmonds has squeezed himself back inside that Blobby suit, the identity of the seasonal chart topper has been decided.

The sure-fire hit has been recorded by Band Aid 20, a blend of pop “superstars”.

Amazingly, what with this being a cover version of Do They Know It’s Christmas, there is no sign of those cabaret cruise ship warblers Westlife, Boyzone or Ronan Keating.

There are, however, two other top Irish acts on the record that, according to the Sun, would never had been recorded had it not been for the paper’s tireless work.

And as in the Sun’s exclusive story, we read in the Mail that one of those Irish popstars, Bono, is not singing in harmony.

In “Band Aid Hit By Bickering Bono”, the man who vies with Bob Geldof (who does appear on the record) for the title Patron Saint of Pop, is unhappy that the line he sang on the original version has been given to another.

The Sun has a picture of Bono above the righteous lyric “Well, tonight thank God it’s them instead of you”, but the Mail says that this time round those words will be sung by Justin Hawkins of The Darkness.

Hawkins has already sung the line but, according to the Mail, Bono is jetting into Blighty to record his version over the top.

The Mirror is also in on the Sun’s exclusive (“It Was The Sun Wot Sung It”) story and manages to speak with Hawkins.

“We both recorded the same line,” says he. “I did it better than him but his management kicked up a stink and he is going to do it again today. It means politically I’m not allowed to sing it.”

Poor Justin. But there may be some solace from an unlikely source.

Should America re-release its Live Aid single, We Are The World, someone may be need to play the role of Michael Jackson.

And with Aled Jones all grown up and Gary Glitter out of the country, who better than Justin..?’



Posted: 15th, November 2004 | In: Tabloids Comment | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed: RSS 2.0 | TrackBack | Permalink