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The Greenhouse Effect

by | 23rd, November 2004

‘HOW Tony Blair must be delighted that it’s Her Majesty the Queen reading out his party’s manifesto today and not King Charles!

Tony was impressed with Patricia’s promise of hot air for all

It’s hard to imagine King Charles being able to resist slipping a memo of his own into the papers before him and stirring up a hornet’s nest of trouble as he calls for better teaching in schools, denounces the ban on fox-hunting and moans about how he has to brush his own teeth these days.

He might even use his moment in the limelight to expose some Government hypocrisy, a role which – in his absence – the Times is happy to fill as it takes a look at the Secretary of State for Trade and Industry’s offices.

There they are. You can’t miss them, lit up as they are like the seasonal Christmas tree every night of the week, the lights burning long after the boss has gone home.

Inside the building, you can probably hear a radio still blaring away, as Trade and Industry Secretary Patricia Hewitt launches her Energy Smart campaign.

In an impassioned call to arms, Hewitt beseeches householders to do their bit to save energy and, in so doing, to save the planet.

It is the same message as that delivered a few years back by John Prescott, who tried to persuade households to turn off their televisions, video recorders and computers, rather than leave them on standby.

He then got into one of his many cars and drove off to one of his many homes, while the public looked on a little unsure whether to do as he said or as he did.

Now Hewitt wants the people to cut down their energy consumption. She wants you to put some insulation in your loft and pump the cavities in your walls with some heat-loss preventing foam.

When you’ve finished watching The World’s Greatest Roller Coasters on TV, she wants you to get out of bed to turn the telly off.

Even better if you can incorporate this into your daily keep-fit regime, perhaps jogging to the TV or moving with a vigorous rowing motion.

And finally if you can manage it, turn the lights off when you go to bed.

Not only will you sleep better, but the energy saved can be put to good use, like giving Ms Hewitt’s office block a welcoming glow on a chill winter’s night…’



Posted: 23rd, November 2004 | In: Uncategorized Comment | TrackBack | Permalink