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Anorak News | Clogged Heart

Clogged Heart

by | 17th, December 2004

‘WHEN the Scots start giving their neighbours to the south a lesson in healthy eating (as they did earlier this week), something is terribly wrong.

‘Deep-fried Mars bars all round!’

It is akin to being given diet advice from one of the 40 million supersized Americans.

Scotland, after all, is the home of the deep-fried Mars bar, thousands of which are apparently sold every week.

According to the Times, one on five chip shops north of the border admits to having the nutritional equivalent of a cardiac arrest on its menu.

Those are the findings of Dr David Morrison, an NHS consultant in public health medicine, and Dr Mark Pettigrew, of the Medical Research Council.

‘We can now confirm,’ Dr Morrison tells the paper, ‘that there is no doubt – the deep-fried Mars bar is not just an urban myth.’

What the Scots – and the rest of us, for that matter – should be eating instead is a bowl of watercress soup, followed by grilled fillet of mackerel, rounded off with chocolate mousse.

All contain ingredients – garlic, fish, wine, dark chocolate etc. – that have been shown to prolong life.

And the results of such a diet can be dramatic. For men, an extra six and a half years (with a heart attack delayed by nine years) and, for women, an extra five years.

At least, that’s how it will seem as you sit down to a bowl of watercress soup for the 5,679th consecutive meal…’



Posted: 17th, December 2004 | In: Uncategorized Comment | TrackBack | Permalink