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Plus Ones

by | 31st, March 2005

‘WHEN we heard yesterday that Prince Charles had jetted off to Klosters for his stag do with 40 of his friends, we started to think.

”Where’s the ruddy valve?”

Taking up a pen and a blank piece of paper, we began to write the names of they who would tie the heir to the throne’s puckered naked body to a Swiss lamppost with only a begonia to protest his modesty.

Our rule was that they must be Charles’s friends not staff, not his toothpaste squeezer, not his favourite houseplants, but friends.

And after an hour of toil, we came up with…no-one. But as we began to despair, we read in today’s Mirror that the stag do is down to 30 in number.

Phew! This should make the task in hand of working out who Charles’s friends are far simpler. And, indeed, we hear that a certain Charles Palmer-Tomkinson is along for the ride. So that’s one.

And so is Charles’s daughter Tara, her sister Santa and her husband Simon Sebag-Montefiore. That’s four.

The Mirror also spots Prince Harry (funf) and his mate Guy Pelly (six), who the paper reminds readers was once wrongly accused of supplying the would-be ginger Fuhrer with cannabis.

And that’s it. Even with a son, a son-in-law, two daughters and a Guy, the count is only up to six. Even when we include

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Posted: 31st, March 2005 | In: Tabloids Comment | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed: RSS 2.0 | TrackBack | Permalink