A Shaw-Fire Hit

‘IT’S not hard to imagine who Darren Day wanted to be like when he was younger. Only, before sticking out his teeth, Darren should have asked himself if Cliff Richard would have walked out on his baby son.

Suzanne and her shit

No, he would not have. So when Darren left five-month-old Corey and his fiancée Suzanne Shaw, he finally gave up all hope of being the new Cliff Richard.

This would be a big blow to any performer of Darren’s qualities, but he should steel himself for more upset as the Mirror reports that Ms Shaw has recorded a song about the break up.

Called It’s Just The Way You Are, the lyrics run: “You are poison dragged me down/ You can’t stop playing around/ It’s just the way you are/ It’s just the way you are.”

It is, is it not, a song of rare genius. And Suzanne could not have excelled herself greater had she found a word to rhyme with orange, or Day.

Buoyed by that early success, Suzanne goes on: “I’m sick and tired of your games/ You know you’ve got shit for brains/ You think it’s just a cool romance/ But all you do is think of your pants.”

Sadly, this work of art is not yet a bona fide single, and remains a demo that was only “unearthed” by a Radio 1 DJ when he started to dig through his rolodex of PR operatives.

But we feel we are at the outset of a war of words, and eagerly await Darren’s response.

Look out for a teary rendition of Corey Doesn’t Live Here falling into a bargain bucket somewhere near you…’

Posted: 24th, May 2005 | In: Tabloids Comment | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed: RSS 2.0 | TrackBack | Permalink