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Bill & Coo

by | 17th, January 2006

‘YOU can’t trust a parrot. They will always talk.

Take the Sun’s story of an African grey called Ziggy. Ziggy is a talented bird. He can’t play guitar but he can sing like a canary.

Ziggy lives with his owner, Chris Taylor, and Suzy Collins, Chris’s girlfriend of two years.

Just listen to what Ziggy says when the phone rings. “Hiya Gary,” says Ziggy as Suzy’s mobile trills. “Hiya Gary. Hiya Gary.” And so on.

And that’s not all. When the name Gary is mentioned on TV or the radio, Ziggy makes kissing sounds.

As the Mirror reports (“PILLOW SQUAWK”), Chris thought it was a hoot. “I just dismissed it as something he’d picked up from the telly. I thought it was hilarious.”

But Chris was wrong. Gary was not a name chosen at random – Gary was the name of Suzy’s pretty boy lover. Things came to ahead when Chris and Suzy were cuddled up on the sofa and Ziggy blurted out “I love you, Gary”.

Suzy blushed a deep beetroot red. Suzy cried. Suzy confessed to a four-month affair with a former work colleague called Gary. Suzy was shown the door.

But if Ziggy planned to get rid of cheating Suzy – “I couldn’t stand Ziggy and it looks now like the feeling was mutual,” says Suzy – it was a plan that backfired. Ziggy didn’t know when to stop. He kept banging on about Gary this and Gary that.

As Chris tells the Mail: “I couldn’t get him to stop saying that bloody name. It felt like I’d been stabbed through the heart every time my phone rang or he heard the name on the telly.”

So Ziggy followed Suzy out of the door. And, we’d like to think, into Gary’s waiting arms…’



Posted: 17th, January 2006 | In: Tabloids Comment | TrackBack | Permalink