Eat Me

That’s the promise on OK!’s index page, and not wishing to be prudish we prepare to tuck into the desperate blonde of last season’s Big Brother.

And as we turn the pages, so much of the blonde did suddenly seems to make sense.

We remember how she offered up her enhanced chest to the housemates for tenderising. Was her chest not plump and succulent. Was the stuffing not tastefully stuffed?

Orlaith has been making a meal of her volauvent of fame, and here she is telling us about how the paparazzi are always about whether she is out for night or going for a drive in her boyfriend’s new Porsche.

To that we say “Meung Cum”. Sounds disgusting, the kind of thing you hear on a film about Vietnam, when the lads are looking for some “R and R” in Saigon.

It also happens to be a concoction of water, tamarind paste, sugar, dried shrimp, salted peanuts and more dried shrimp. It’s not called Meung Cum for nothing.

After that, Orlaith and her fella (now out of his Porsche) trouble the Mango Tree restaurant, London, for a plate of lobster pad Thai (noodles with an unshelled lobster shoved on top) and some mango sticky rice (it does what it says on the tin).

All that’s left is to round it off with a little Orlaith digestive. So Orlaith, “do you have any advice for the new Big Brother housemates.” Orlaith: “Yes – don’t do it.”

They’ll eat you alive…

Posted: 30th, May 2006 | In: Media Comment | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed: RSS 2.0 | TrackBack | Permalink