Herr We Go

DOES Sven Goran Eriksson’s halo-styled hair have more bounce today?

We ask in light of the Mirror’s news that the England manager has just had a spell under Manchester United manager Sir Alex Ferguson’s famous hairdryer.

“HERR DRYER,” says the Mirror’s headline. The news is that the pair shared a heated “four-letter exchange” over the matter of Wayne Rooney’s toe.

During the 25-minute phone call on Wednesday, Ferguson is said to have ranted at the Swede. “Ferguson goes ballistic over Rooney verdict,” says the Mail. The piece is afforded the exiting title “Sven at war”.

But surely Sven is too civilised for war? Is he not the man who emptied the dishwasher before bedding Faria Alam? Any fight with Sven will only take place once he has vacuumed the lounge carpet and dusted his Nancy.

But we are mistaken. And in the Express we read that Sven was up for a fight. The paper says that while Fergie ranted and raved, Sven “warned” him to stay out of things that do not concern him.

By way of an example of how Sven saw off Fergie’s assault, we note what he said to the assembled hacks. “I’m prepared to listen to everyone and discuss with them about Rooney, but the last say in this story is Rooney’s and mine.”

Though not quite in the league of Brian Clough (“If I had an argument with a player we would sit down for twenty minutes, talk about it and then decide I was right!”), Sven’s words are a welcome departure from his more usual “Yes, er, well, you see, yes, very good, I think so”.

And Sven has more to say. He continues: “I’m doing this in the best interests of Rooney, the England team and 40 million England fans. I’m responsible for it.”

Not to mention it being in the best interests of a manager keen to leave his job on a high and who knows that Rooney holds the key to England success.

But we must not be too excited. The Express hears from James Bliss, a consultant orthopaedic surgeon at Guy’s and St Thomas’s hospital, London. He says the nation is being “deluded” about Wayne. Says he: “There is a significant risk of his foot breaking down.”

But Bliss concedes that Rooney should be fit enough to play in the World Cup’s late stages. Which should be fine so long as the team qualify from their group.

And we should not expect too much. As the Mail reports, of 14 matches played in opening matches at major tournaments, England have won just three – and lost five.

And have never won an opening match with Rooney on the field…

Posted: 9th, June 2006 | In: Back pages Comment | TrackBack | Permalink