Wazza Does A Gazza

“WAZZA HAZZA WOBBLA,” says the Sun’s front page. And, as is the way with things football, the story has a vital lip reading element.

Pictured on a boat in St Tropez, Wayne Rooney looks like he is all ready to cry. To his left sits the dutiful Coleen McLoughlin.

We cannot hear what’s being said, but lip readers at the Sun tells us that Coleen is telling her footballer: “Don’t worry darling, he’s only got four years left on his contract.”

The he is Cristiano Ronaldo, the Portuguese winker and Wayne’s Manchester United team-mate. Reports are that rather than fleeing the country, Ronaldo will remain at United. And the suggestion is that Wayne is less then pleased.

But Coleen (yellow floral bikini) thinks she knows how to cheer up her man. As an onlooker says: “Coleen tried to perk him up by tweaking his ear and stroking his head, yet he remained down it the dumps.”

Coleen’s magic is not working. But she does not give up on her man. And the Mirror looks on as she rubs soothing sunblock into his reddish face.

But still we don’t see Wayne smile. And we begin to wonder what can be troubling England’s tyro. You don’t suppose someone’s said something about his mum, do you?

Posted: 13th, July 2006 | In: Tabloids Comment | TrackBack | Permalink