Chantelle Houghton Marries Preston

FOR those of you not invited to the wedding of Chantelle Houghton and Samuell Preston, OK! invites you to gaze at the splendour.

And there is much to behold. There is “PRINCESS DIANA’S WEDDING GOWN”, a “16TH CENTURY MAYFAIR MANSION” and “JORDAN CAKE”.

Excited at the prospect of seeing the Princess’s of Hearts’ dress become a celebrity in its own right and chow down on a cake made from pumpkin and saline solution, we move inside the magazine.

And here comes Chantelle. To the strains of the Ramones’ Baby I Love You, the newly brunette Celebrity Big Brother winner glides through the splendour of Dartmouth House in London.

“Preston cheekily tapped his watch to indicate a lengthy wait,” notes OK!. Indeed, with Big Brother’s blonde Nikki Grahame and wannabe popstar Pete Bennett the new reality couple in town, Chantelle had best get a move on lest the moment be overtaken.

We and Preston need not worry. Very soon Father John Hicks is addressing the “young and vibrant” couple and uniting them as celebrity husband and celebrity wife.

And so to the business of the reception. The Pommery Rose champagne flows. Florist Andy Davenport declares that roses “present a strong statement for love”. And Alan Houghton, father of the bride, makes ready to speak.

“Words cannot express how I feel,” says Alan. It’s a great speech, and if only Alan had stopped there it would be true. But he goes on to wish the pair of them all the love and happiness in the world.

Then best man Matthew Powers says: “I have never seen one of you without the other and not a smile on your faces.” It seems that it is true – words cannot express how Chantelle and Preston make us feel, especially Matthew.

The groom then speaks about love and being able “to find someone who loves me as much as I do”, and guests munch on fish and chips served in yesterday’s newspapers (see Nikki and Pete).

A cake is cut. The clock strikes 12. “Cinderella” leaves the party. The cake turns back into Jordan. And OK! gets ready for the interview…

Posted: 30th, August 2006 | In: Reviews Comment | TrackBack | Permalink