Jack The Bad

JADE Goody doesn’t live on a council estate. At least not any more. Jade lives in a four-bedroom house in Ongar, Essex.

But still the Sun spots Jade popping to the shops for a sliced loaf and a tin of beans. You can take the girl out of the estate but you can’t take the hydrogenated fats out of the girl.

But Jade is not thinking straight. The Big Brother product is upset at seeing photos of her live-in-lover Jack Tweedy, 18, in bed with a naked blonde.

The Sun says it is to thank for exposing “love rat” Tweedy, having shown Jade pictures of her man with this other woman.

Jade saw the pictures and reacted badly. “Is she wearing a bra?” she asked Jack. “She’s on top of you! What are you gonna says to that, Jack?” Jack thought about it. Thought some more. And replied: “I was drunk.”

And now the police are on their way. Jack has called them. But they do not stay long. It’s all been a mistake. And to prove it, her paper produces a shot of a forlorn looking Jack sporting a scratched cheek.

And Jade wants to know who the unnamed women is. A source says: “She suspects she knows who it is but she wants to be sure. If she ever finds out, that woman had best run for cover.”

But who says it is a woman? We only see the back of a head of blond-ish hair and some bare back. Might it be a man? And might it be Jamie Oliver?

We are sure it isn’t but to be on the safe side, and escape Jade’s wrath, Jamie should think about running while he can. Run, Jamie! Run! And don’t stop running…

Posted: 2nd, October 2006 | In: Tabloids Comment | TrackBack | Permalink