Turner Prize Pervs
“MORE pervy pottery,” says the Telegraph.
Who needs Esther Rantzen’s aroused carrots and internet porn when you have the Turner Prize to get off on?
Yes, it’s that time of year again when Anorak’s vomits into a sock and produces another working of its Vomit In Sock artwork.
In keeping with the times, and offering a cutting commentary on pop culture, consumerism and much more, this year’s vomit will be brought on by eating bags of Nuttalls’ Mintoes and listening to Tony’s Blair valedictory speech to Labour conference.
But we fear it may not be enough. And learning of the Telegraph’s comment on pervy pottery we lament a missed opportunity to swap our sock for a racier stocking.
But it’s a ruse. There is no pervy stuff at all. And we have looked through the Telegraph’s gallery.
Tomma Abts, 38, born in Germany, an “abstract painter”, has produced abstract paintings. And which ever way we look at them, we have thus far only managed to find one leg and what could be an elbow.
And, for purposes of record, the paper’s picture of said artist shows her fully dressed in an abstruse white vest under beige cardigan.
Rebecca Warren, a 41-year-old London-born artist (clothed), has produced clay figures of women. Inspired by Degas’s Little Dancer, the works pose a slight erotic bent.
As the blurb says: “Her sculptures are of cartoon-like women with ‘humongous knobbly breasts and enormous bobbly buttocks’, according to the judges.” It’s the kind of thing Beryl Cook might produce were she to turn her hand to sculpture and bread making.
Mitch Turner, also from London, is a sculptor. “His works explore systems of belief both secular and spiritual often focusing on now marginalised, discredited or forgotten ideologies,” it says here. Happily, these works are in poster form and promise things like “We want answers to the questions of tomorrow” and “You hear a joke about yourself and you join in the laughter”. There is no nudity.
And finally there is Phil Collins. He’s produced a work called Shady Lane Productions. It’s in the form of an office with receptionist and staff.
It’s a moving tableau of office life. Katherine Stout, a curator, tells the Times: “This project investigates the relationship between the production of art and its wider social context.” Another curator, Gair Boase, says: “Collins makes us think of the world today.”
Indeed. Just as Paul Cezanne made us think about the world of his day. And the Times focuses on an exhibition of the modernist’s work.
And looking at Bathers, reproduced in the Times, we can count at least six buttocks, three breasts and much thigh.
This is more like it. Much better than that pervy Turner stuff…
Posted: 3rd, October 2006 | In: Uncategorized Comment | TrackBack | Permalink
