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Video Nasty

by | 21st, November 2006

Britney Spears does Paris…

BRITNEY puts her kinky sex vid on the web,” promises the Star’s front-page headline.

The move comes in light of stories that Kevin Federline, Britney’s estranged husband, could sell the tape to the highest bidder, earning himself as much as £120million, a rise on the £26million the Star priced the 45-minute recording at just last week.

At the current rate of inflation, Britney may care to hang onto the tape for a few weeks longer and agree to split the £5billion fortune it will earn with the feckless husband.

Britney should seek advice. And who better to ask than Paris Hilton, a woman whose home sex movie earned her notoriety, fame and her own Paris Hilton Just Me perfume – sparkling top notes of used hotel laundry with an undertone of adolescent bedroom and tissues.

The movie of Paris’s bedroom audition – entitled One Night In Paris – has reportedly earned £30million.

David Hans Schmidt, who bought the Hilton sex tape to the greater porn surfing fraternity, says the Spears work could be the biggest thing to come out the porn business since Long Dong met Melody Mountains.

Says he: “This tape would smash Paris Hilton’s sex tape sales like an Oreo cookie.”

So here are Britney and Paris collaborating in Las Vegas. The Sun (“DIVAS LAS VEGAS”) sees Britney “a parade around the city’s Tryst club.

The singer is dressed in fishnet stockings and a white silk blouse. This homage to 1980s horror fashion includes a black neck tie.

Looking at the ensemble, we only hope Britney looks better naked than she does clothed…



Posted: 21st, November 2006 | In: Tabloids Comment | TrackBack | Permalink