Outfit For A Prince

KATE Middleton looks like such a nice gel. And then the Star tells us that Prince’s Willy’s lover has gone and bought a batch of “adult toys”.

As the Royal Family tuck into Kentucky Fried Grouse and wear crowns (real ones or paper?), Kate will be in her chambers pulling on her naughty Santa outfit, featuring a red, fur-trimmed strapless dress, elbow-length gloves and a white fur hat.

This ensemble is not to be confused with the outfit Her Majesty wears for the Order of the Garter parade, nor that sported by members of the House of Lords.

This outfit is kinky; that worn by Elizabeth Regina and the a-leaping lords is part of the rich fabric of British culture.

For your information, Kate also invested in a Cone sex toy made from “strokeably soft silicone”, willy-shaped drinking straws and penis pasta.

Meanwhile, over in barracks, the Sun spots Officer Cadet Angela Laycock (it’s true) up against William. “Girl grabs Will sword,” comes the headline.

And the news is that Miss Laycock (it’s still true) will carry the ceremonial “Top Blade” at the passing–out parade before Her Majesty. The sword is awarded to the most promising cadet from the class of 248.

Wills came close to winning, but not cigar. And no, Wills, that is not a cigar – it’s a love wand E-Z vibrator in khaki…

Posted: 8th, December 2006 | In: Tabloids Comment | TrackBack | Permalink