EastEnders’ Shane Richie’s Suicide Note

IT’S Shane Richie’s cry for help.

The fear is that after years of acting in EastEnders, so much exposure to depressing plots and desperate acting, Richie has snapped.

The note at his service apartment reads: “The world is too much for me. I can’t go on with all the disastrous things that keep happening around me.”

Though Shane is no longer playing a Red Coat who’s out-acted by his extroverted shirts in the BBC’s flagship soap opera, the fear is that he has come over all EastEnders. As a star of the dire show might put it: “’E’s gonna top ‘isself.”

Without a moment to lose, Shane’s landlady takes up the note and calls not the emergency services but the producers of Shane’s new telly show.

But - what shock! – this is not the last note of a suicidal ex-soap star. This is part of a script. In the new show, Shane plays a man who winds up standing at the top of a Manchester hotel contemplating killing himself.

“It really was very funny afterwards when the producers called me to check that everything was OK,” says Shane in the Sun.

But not as funny as that time when EastEnders Shane slept with his sister’s wife and got punched in the head. How we laughed…

Anorak

Posted: 12th, February 2007 | In: Tabloids Comment (1) | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed: RSS 2.0 | TrackBack | Permalink