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Anorak | Shear Madness – Britney Spears’ Hair, Jade Goody’s Nose & Prince Harry’s Salute

Shear Madness – Britney Spears’ Hair, Jade Goody’s Nose & Prince Harry’s Salute

by | 24th, February 2007

shear-madness-britney-spears-hair-jade-goodys-nose-prince-harrys-salute.jpg BRITNEY Spears has done for bald men what Victoria Beckham has done for thin women: she has made people question their motives.

Reasons why Britney took up the clippers and shaved off her hair were many. While Anorak looked for lice and a Nazi boyfriend, a customer at Ester’s Hair Studio in Sherman Oaks, where Britney Spears became Britney Shears, said: “She basically just said she was tired of having things plugged into her.”

Being plugged sounded a uniquely unpleasant experience. But we imagined a woman who shared a bed with Kevin Federline was less squeamish than most about having unpleasant things inserted into her person.

The Star just called her a “headcase”. Mad people shave their heads. And cage wrestlers. And since Britney was never a fighter, she must be a nut.

“She’s ill and in need of help,” said the Sun’s showbiz editor, a woman with black hair on her head. Britney was “totally unhinged”. Britney was “obviously suffering from a breakdown”.

And while Britney slipped in and out of rehab, Jade Goody got her head examined.

Jade has yet to shave her bonce. Although if her career demands it, and her agent suggests it, she just might. We imagine Jade is watching the Britney story with a keen slightly winking eye.

But can Jade ever recover? As a source told us: “It could take weeks or months, and even then she may only get over it if she can meet Shilpa again.”

The odds are slimmer than an Indian chicken chef of the Bollywood babe stooping to save Jade’s career.

But where there are therapy and prescription drugs, there is hope.

But Jade was exploding with “rage” and hurling “vile insults” at Big Brother’s Danielle Lloyd.

Jade, described as “furious”, was seen “squaring up to Danielle” and launching a “scathing attack”. The venue was Nu Bar in Loughton, a “popular footballers’ wives drinking den”.

Jade was said to be upset that while she went to The Priory and did public penance to save her career as the UK’s premier village idiot, Dani swanned off to Dubai and back into the arms

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Posted: 24th, February 2007 | In: Tabloids Comments (2) | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed: RSS 2.0 | TrackBack | Permalink