Michael Barrymore’s Bolero

MICHAEL Barrymore is “troubled”. And “baffled”. And “amazed”.

Barrymore is singing theatrical duets with Jenny Seagrove. He is gardening at Bill Kenwright’s house. He is playing with a fold-up bike. Little wonder he is troubled, baffled and amazed.

But some thing other than how to peddle a Brompton bike round the biggest aspidistras in the word while singing I’m Gonna Wash That Man Right Outa My Hair is bothering Barrymore.

As a “close friend” tells the Mirror: “He’s amazed he was arrested… He was by the canal smoking a cigarette and the next thing he knew he was bundled into the back of a police car… He cannot understand it all. It’s just extraordinary.”

The source tells us that Barrymore is innocent and has not gone to pieces. A neighbour tells the Mail, “He looked really stressed out, like he was about to cry.”

People Do The Funniest Things 

Of course, Barrymore will do whatever the script demands. And the Sun tells us that his career is to be revived by Caroline Aherne. The “funnygirl” is writing a quiz show for Channel 4 which Barrymore will host.

Called Bolero, the show will offer a star prize to which contestant can best explain how Stuart Lubbock, who was found dead at Barrymore’s home, came to suffer severe injuries to his rectum.

To get the ball rolling, Barrymore has already suggested a necrophiliac at the mortuary and an “anal thermometer”.

While Anorak lubes up Jane Torvill’s ice skate, Aherne tells us: “I’ve written Bolero for Barrymore. And I’ve never seen him in better health.”

The show will also feature former Page 3 stunna Melinda Messenger. Possibly wearing a swimsuit and rubber gloves…

Anorak

Posted: 18th, June 2007 | In: Tabloids Comments (4) | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed: RSS 2.0 | TrackBack | Permalink