The Spice Girls Say Goodbye With A Global Message

THE Spice Girls want to say goodbye.

They could just wave, write us a letter or with the scream “Girl Power” kick us in the genitals and run.

But the Spice Girls want to do it properly. They want to say goodbye in a series of concerts, give the fans a hint of what they will miss when the girls finally hang up their surgical support bras and miracle suits.

And the good news for them is that the fans will pay them each a £10million golden handshake.

Details of this farewell “extravaganza”, and how you can pay, will be made next Friday from a rostrum in the Millennium Dome.

“No expense is being spared to make this an unrivalled spectacular,” says a “highly-placed source in Team Spice”.

Good news indeed that a tribe of singers and danger will be hired to enliven the stage, adding rhythm to Geri’s lead-boot dancing and a context for Victoria’s individual fork-in-a-blender voice.

The group will travel in no little luxury. As the Mirror says, to keep the girls happy they will traverse the globe in five private jets.

That’s right, reader, the Spices have taken our advice and set about using up all the world’s resources as quickly as possible. Only when all the oil is gone will we take the subject of energy efficiency seriously.

Of course, in keeping with fashion – and what are five thirty-something women with children various if not at the apogee of fashion? – the Spice Girls will have to offset their carbon emission with so much wood.

So look out for a rerun of Spice World the movie and pay special attention to Scary’s performance, a mighty oak among the bamboo…

Anorak

Posted: 22nd, June 2007 | In: Tabloids Comments (7) | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed: RSS 2.0 | TrackBack | Permalink