Britney Spears’ Tum Deal At MTV Awards
BRITNEY Spears has always depended on the kindness of strangers. Or stringers, given that since giving full throat to the pleasures of domestic violence, Britney has existed only in the media.
But remaining in the limelight is no easy thing. To do so Britney needs a new talent.
If music is no longer her thing, much less dancing, she needs to: be available and knickerless (check), have children (check), juggle her life with her children, literally (check), do something with her hair, such as put it in a paper bag (check), go into rehab (check).
Having trod fame’s stepping stones, Spears’ options are dwindling. She can now either a) date Pete Doherty (possibly meeting him in rehab); b) become a UN goodwill ambassador; c) adopt a child; d) go to prison; or d) put on weight.
As the Sun shows on its front page, Spears has opted for ‘d’.
In “Brit is the Pits” the paper looks on a Spears appears at the MTV Awards in Las Vegas.
We already know that Spears cannot dance or sing all that well, points she was keen to confirm to an audience of millions.
She is pictured stumbling into a man who is gazing at her tummy.
In the Star, which has two pages dedicated to Spears’ uselessness, another dancer is placing a hand over the former singer/dancer’s midriff in the manner of an expectant father.
But Britney is not pregnant, news in itself. This is just “BRITNEY’S TUM-BACK” (Mirror). The paper talks of “flab”. The Mail sees a “paunch” and weight on her hips.
Success for Britney. She can now balloon to massive dimensions. And then, as is the way of such things, she will lose the weight in a TV spectacular.
The press will then be free to talk about Spears’s yo-yoing weight and create news as she eats a lump of fat or doesn’t…
Posted: 11th, September 2007 | In: Britney Spears, Celebrities Comments (19) | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed: RSS 2.0 | TrackBack | Permalink
Comments
September 13th, 2007 at 10:19 pm
She’s going thru her teenage, missed due Mickey Mouse club and other activities.
Hopefully she’ll get by eventually, like most of us did.
Her body seemed totally normal, not fat. I’m happy she’s not anorectic.
Maybe mtv show was little under par. On the otherhad, it was entertaining to see a little not-too-over-rehearsed and loose-camp approach. Rarely any opener in WMA has produced so much buzz. And no nipples exposed this time like in super bowl.
We’ve seen so many robotic anorectic puppet athlete dance acts.
There are many tabloids and other journals willing to tear her to pieces. I hope she eventually recovers form all mess she’s now into.
September 13th, 2007 at 12:01 pm
I think she might have got away with the extra pounds if she had put in a decent performance, but word has it she was up to the eyeballs in valium to calm her nerves…
September 13th, 2007 at 4:50 am
Judging Britney’s performance on the VMA and her “comeback” or lack thereof on the basis of her weight is a perfect example of how American priorities are completely f!@#ed up. Get real people. Even if she had put on weight and even if she was above her BMI, my God, why does this matter so much? She looks perfectly healthy even if she has a few extra pounds compared to pre-pregnancy Britney. We aren’t talking about morbid obesity or something…her weight shouldn’t (nor should anyone’s) be given such importance unless it is a medical condition (and that’s really not our business either folks). Weight is a NUMBER people. It doesn’t define who a person is…or define a performance. Oh wait, is Britney different? Is that what her fans and society REALLY want? Not a good performance of a song but a thin blonde babe shaking a bit better? Well, that’s just shallow. It is so shallow it makes me want to vomit. The shame is on all of YOU America and not Britney POSSIBLY carrying a FEW extra pounds. If Britney gets any blame, it is for feeding you vampires what you wanted back in the day. I could reference my weight and height and stats here but the fact is, this has nothing to do with who I am as a person and my opinion…why would my dress size support my opinion? It doesn’t. But maybe I am different in that I don’t give a crap about everyone’s lengthly personalization of their weight and how it relates to Britney and her current drama. I mean, spare me - it means as little as Britney’s weight. America, get a f!@#’g life.
September 12th, 2007 at 6:43 pm
She is one sad case - she’s way hurtin’. Go ahead and tag her, Anon. You could probably have a shot seeing how far she’s dropped - if you catch her when she’s as high/drunk as she was during that dance.
September 12th, 2007 at 12:06 pm
I’d still give her one.
If my opinion’s of any value.
September 12th, 2007 at 8:11 am
any one seen K-Ferret?
September 12th, 2007 at 2:44 am
Obviously she has shown some depolorable judgment of late. However, she had 2 children (one almost on top of the other) and IMO, she is suffering from lingering PPD. She needs to address that. I feel sorry for the poor gal, truly.
September 12th, 2007 at 2:38 am
oh my gosh ! she has a small pouch that she could tighten
up in 2 weeks at the gym. She is maybe 7-8 pounds over
and need firming up. Thats better then 40 -50 pounds with
a huge ass and cellulite. I would like to see most women
go out and look that good. yeah i agree alicia keyes took
my breath away with that tight outfit and thighs exploding.
September 11th, 2007 at 10:06 pm
Anorak
HA! HA!
September 11th, 2007 at 8:14 pm
Anorak, is there something we don’t know? do you moonlight as MTV?? Hmmm. I think we should be told!
September 11th, 2007 at 7:25 pm
Lang Lang - the people’s pianist? has he been in rehab?
September 11th, 2007 at 5:59 pm
To: MTV NETWORK,
We the people are sick and tired of all the crappy shows and want more music! What happened? When I say more music… I say you should casts votes on your website and let us decide what we want!
Your network pays all this money to your employees to come up with shows and in all “reality” it is up to the viewers on what we want to watch! We want more music! Cast a vote and you will see!
You play the same shows over and over again! Why would we want to see the same episode a million times! We are in a world with the capabilities of recording the episodes! I know! You could be playing more music instead! Just a thought!
We want change MTV! We are the viewers and maybe..just maybe…if you listen to what your viewers want to watch…your ratings might even go up! Just a thought again!
What the hell happened to the Vmas this year! I am still bewildered!
How in the hell are you even doing the VMAS in the first place? All you show on MTV is stupid reality shows!
Kanye West should of opened the VMAS with stronger! Stronger is off the hook!
No offense to Britney spears! I must say though, why in the hell would you let her open when she has not had a hit song in awhile! Britney had no chance to prepare in time! It did not seem like your network even cared as long as your network had your so called ratings.
You might of had your ratings this year! Finally! At who’s expense though?
I am so disgusted! All that to get ratings!
We need change MTV or we will just not watch your network anymore!
SIGN THE PETITION …CLICK ON THE LINK BELOW
http://www.PetitionOnline.com/musicmtv/petition.html
September 11th, 2007 at 3:43 pm
hAhA ShES GAYYYY!
September 11th, 2007 at 2:03 pm
Why is the media even showing this talentless nothing out there? Is standing up in a sexy outfit, lip-syncing and dancing around like she has “ants in her pants” a sign of endless talent? Certainly not! It enters the same category as the inane American Idol show which exhibits talentless,unmusical acts. If one is looking for “real” musical talent, look up the name Lang Lang.
September 11th, 2007 at 1:42 pm
I am really amazed at how many folks are fascinated with Britney being “fat” -
when Alicia Keys’ thighs almost exploded out of their spandex - not to mention Beyonce is amazonian jr.
September 11th, 2007 at 1:24 pm
It’s a shame that the media are spending so much attention to her body instead of the subject that’s far more important:
This girl, totally screwed up these days, once chose to be a rolemodel for young kids and teens, and got paid very well to do so. Obviously, she went through a lot, but thats is no excuse for her recent behaviour, or for this terrible show.
During her performance at the VMA, she looks like she is either drunk/ stoned or, even more likely, both. I think she is in no MENTAL shape to make a comeback, first she should clean herself up. Or maybe she is experimenting with the Amy Winehouse lifestyle?
Britney Spears was never my cup of tea, but I have a lot of respect for those who work as hard as she used to do. Where is her discipline? What is left of her self-respect? I suggest she makes an appointment with a good shrink.
Maartje Bronkhorst, Amsterdam
September 11th, 2007 at 12:51 pm
I would def not describe her as fat or plain. Putting on a bit of weight to look and be healthy should not be described as “fatter”. She looks healthy, toned and fit. I’d want my daughters to look like her rather than any of those skeletal things the tabloids worship. But if they behaved liked her …
September 11th, 2007 at 12:05 pm
Is she now more ‘real’ she is fatter and plainer?
September 11th, 2007 at 11:53 am
She looks better than those social x-rays she hangs out with.