Britney Spears Grows Up And Out And Sideways
BRITNEY Spears assumes her usual place on the cover of the National Enquirer.
Although she threatens to move into the Jennifer Aniston Zone to her left and the Jolie Area to her underneath. As the headline goes Britney “GAINS 42lbs”.
Like you, we have no idea what 42lbs is, having gone metric when Angelina Jolie was in Paris.
But it sounds a lot. And there is every reason to believe that Britney is growing up with her audience, moving effortlessly from lithe-limbed blonde American schoolgirl to large-limbed, heavy-set American woman.
As such, she should embrace her changing shape. Or as a source puts it: “She grabs the fact on her stomach and thighs and says she wishes it would melt off.”
Posted: 9th, October 2007 | In: Britney Spears, Celebrities, National Enquirer Comments (8) | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed: RSS 2.0 | TrackBack | Permalink
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October 10th, 2007 at 1:47 pm
Blast you, David! I knew my ass looked bigger today!
Is it just me or my screen, or does that picture have cellulite drawn into it?
October 10th, 2007 at 12:57 pm
The law of conservation of energy states that energy is never destroyed it is only converted from one form to another. What has this to do with Britney you ask? Stay with me here, we scientific types do get to the point eventually.
I have a theory.. The law of Conservation of Fat (are you listening Nobel prize committee?)
This, of course, states that fat is never destroyed but only oozes from one person to another. Therefore as Angelina fades away Britney expands.
I recently lost a few kilos myself so my fat is out there looking for a home, it could be heading for Britain….
LOOK OUT BEHIND YOU!!!!!!
October 9th, 2007 at 10:49 pm
yep her bod is healthy, but her brain is addled - where have you been?
October 9th, 2007 at 8:19 pm
Thea - less lose the fat then retrain it; perhaps a double act?
October 9th, 2007 at 6:04 pm
here exercise regime should begin working. or maybe she’s holding her voluptuousness the wrong way? i think here thumbs should be pointinig outwards while she makes her wishes. this way no matter what part of her body she is grabbing she can stimulate her svadisthana chakra and firm and tone within days of making here ‘fat melting wishes’. it’s just misdirected accumulated talent waiting to be transmorphed into a great acting role, hip clothing line or sexy new pop tune.
October 9th, 2007 at 5:56 pm
She’s not fat. Yes, she’s put on a few pounds, but so what? I’d rather see her indulge than be on the constant Hollywood diet. What she needs is a new stylist who understands the basic concept of clothing…
The sketch is great though (love the dog).
Anorak, write about whatever you want! People are talking about it, so it is natural that this would pop up. If anything it is nice to read it here instead of hearing it on TV, etc. as the author can see your feedback and you can express your views on the topic (easily).
October 9th, 2007 at 5:28 pm
I never talk of Britney’s weight. Never!
October 9th, 2007 at 5:07 pm
OMG give me a break here Britney looks great and NOBODY needs to be a size zero to look good…how about we embrace the fact that she looks NORMAL and leave the poor girl alone.
I cant believe that your even taking the time to talk about such CRAP!!!