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Twenty Steps To Not Being Fat: Porkers Banned From Going Upstairs

by | 16th, October 2007

“MY 20 tips to stop your child being obese,” says “Slimline” Sally McDonnell in the Mirror.

She should have made it 20 Steps, thus encouraging the fat to place one foot before the other and move forward in a motion known to millions as “walking”.

But let’s start small. Little steps. And Sally’s top tip is when you come in from school not to have crisps and chocolate. “Have fruit or some rice cakes with a spread like Marmite.”

Tip two is to limit the amount of crisps and snacks; Step 3: buy smaller crisps and snakes; Step 4: eat healthy food (ie not crisps and snacks)…

And so it goes. Until Sally falls upon the novelty called moving.

At no point does Sally decide that being obese is OK and those Americans in the mid-West and a couple of Tonga’s First XV reserves have got it right.

But being fat is wrong. And over in the Sun, readers are met by the headline: “Hospital fatty bar.”

“Fat patients have been banned from a first-floor hospital waiting room – because bosses fear that they could collapse the building.”

It has been decreed that any patient weighing in excess of 30 stone remain on the ground floor of Ealing Hospital, London.

And should under no circumstance should they walk up the stairs, aka the steps…



Posted: 16th, October 2007 | In: Tabloids Comments (4) | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed: RSS 2.0 | TrackBack | Permalink