The Fall Guys: Celebrity Survivor In Malibu

“MALIBU MELTS,” screams the Sun. “PARADISE IN FLAMES,” announces the Mirror.”

THE COAST IS TOAST,” says the cover of a DVD starring Tommy Lee Jones as man trying to plug a Volcano with his thumb and bridled grit.

But this is real. Malibu is alight. The sky is boiling. As Chris Ayres writes in the Times: “Celebrities were running screaming from their blazing mansions. And the AL Goreans were on TV again, spreading the word about the end of the world.”

Blame the porn industry, air conditioning and the Jews; whatever the reason, Malibu is alight. It’s not the trailer for a new disaster film. This is real.
As the Mirror notes, that really is Cher’s house in the line of fire. Will it survive? Will Cher’s face hold up in so much heat?

Will the homes of Adam Sandler, Sting, Pamela Anderson, Mel Gibson, Jane Seymour, Tom Hanks, Olivia Newton-John, Courtney Cox and Jennifer Aniston last out? Val Kilmer, says the Telegraph. Jim Carrey. The Sun produces Sean Penn, Pierce Brosnan and Barbra Streisand.

The Mirror has an overhead view of the area and the homes mapped out. We look. We think. And Anorak asks the burning question: “Who gets saved first?”

And we throw in Richard Gere, Robert Redford and Diana Ross.

“It’s a tragic time for California,” says State Governor Arnold Schwarzenegger.

Who advocates an alphabetical approach to life saving, starting with A for Arnold…

Anorak

Posted: 23rd, October 2007 | In: Celebrities, Tabloids Comments (4) | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed: RSS 2.0 | TrackBack | Permalink