Anorak

Anorak | Go West: Security Minister Checks In At Gordon Brown’s Big Hotel

Go West: Security Minister Checks In At Gordon Brown’s Big Hotel

by | 15th, November 2007

lord-west.jpgHAVING learned that getting into the UK is easy, staying here even simpler and working illegally fine, unless the Home Office thinks the media say otherwise, the Mail brings new for those trying to leave.

“THE AIRPORT INQUISTION,” says the paper’s front-page headline. “Travellers must answer 53 questions before going abroad.”

Clever stuff from the Gordon Brown, who mindful of Mail headlines that we are leaving the place in our droves – yesterday the Mail said 3milion Britons will be fleeing over Christmas to escape reality TV – the plan is to check us on the way out.

It is a policy beloved by hotels. You arrive calling yourself whatever you choose. You avail yourself of the facilities. And when you leave you are asked to provide your correct name, address and payment details.

As the Mail says, security officials are the borders will ask for your credit card details, holiday contact numbers and email address (tick the box to receive details of new promotions, special offers and amnesties). It is part of the what the Express calls “Fortress Britain”.

And there will be questions. When answering, the trick is to be consistent and give the Government-sanctioned reply.

But way of a working example, the Mail reproduces the words of one Lord West, the Security Minister.

The question put to him is: Is the Lord convinced by the Prime Minister’s argument that the current detention limit of 28 days should be increased?

Lord West (it is 8:13 am): “I still need to be fully convinced that we absolutely need more than 28 days and I also need to be convinced what is the best way of doing that.”

An uneasy shuffle. Gordon Brown appears. Lord West is led into a room. The snap of rubber gloves is heard.

Lord West (9:15am): “My feeling is, yes, we need more than 28 days.”

Can you be more certain? Snap!

Lord West 9:50am: “I am quite clear that the greater complexities of terrorist plots will mean that we will need the power to detain certain individuals for more than 28 days.”

You are free to go. Free to come. But you may never leave this place…

Picture: Poldraw 



Posted: 15th, November 2007 | In: Tabloids Comment (1) | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed: RSS 2.0 | TrackBack | Permalink