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Leonardo DiCaprio Pans For Global Warming

by | 4th, January 2008

WE last saw Leonardo DiCaprio on the cover of Vanity Fair magazine. He was stood on a lump of ice.

The message was that the world was melting and unless we all act NOW DiCaprio will revisit the drowning scene from Titanic – literally. DiCaprio will be undone by a rogue iceberg once more.

We last heard DiCpario in the Sun, when he told us: “Ultimately it’s about driving our governments and our corporations to infuse ecology into every day livings standards.”

Now we see DiCaprio in the Star, where the news is that he is the proud owner of a remote controlled toilet.

Wires and such like mean the seat, which flips open whenever Leo approaches, like a penguin chick at feeding time, is warmed.

Six seconds after he has got up, the seat closes, although at what speed is unsaid. (Curry munchers and those suffering from tummy upsets should take note.)

A blast of water and then air clean the DiCaprio recesses. A built-in deodoriser kills off any “pongs”.

As the Star says: “The waste-saving superstar toilet meets all Leo’s environmentally friendly standards.”

Indeed. All waste material is relocated to the Artic tundra via a pipeline and used as bedding for orphaned polar bears and to construct a Papier-mâché visitor centre…



Posted: 4th, January 2008 | In: Celebrities, Tabloids Comment | TrackBack | Permalink