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Britney Spears’ Flying Circus, Kentwood

by | 12th, January 2008

britney-spears-rich.pngTHE Mirror’s Britney Spears correspondent is in Kentwood, Louisiana.

She is investigating. The question is “what if Britney had never found fame and simply slipped back into obscurity after child stardom on the Mickey Mouse club? Would a very ordinary Britney today be a Kentwood housewife, content with nights out at Nyla’s Burger Basket, inviting friends to a crawfish boil on Sunday nights and limiting herself to £60 a month in a local Gap store?”

Mirror readers in their ready-meal starter homes may well fizz at news of the exotic.

But Julie McCaffrey is not looking for answers. So she speaks with “mum-of-two” Sarah Schilling, who “like Britney, is 26 and is from Kentwood.” Although: “She’s never seen her name up in lights, never been photographed without her knickers and never shaved off her long hair..”

Indeed, being in the Daily Mirror may be the closest she has got to fame.

Says Sarah: “I used to think of Britney as the girl who had it all – a megastar with fame, fortune and a fabulous lifestyle. But now I wouldn’t swap places with her for anything in the world.”

Ms McCaffrey fails to offer her £65m, Britney’s estimated fortune, her home in New York, another in Malibu and a boyfriend from Birmingham. But, in any case, the point has been made.

Says Sarah: “Money doesn’t buy you happiness – everyone knows that. And you don’t need flashy celebrity friends or fancy bars to have a good time… Britney needs to turn her back on Hollywood and come back home.”

Reading this is like looking at the Monty Python’s Four Yorkshiremen sketch in reverse.

BRITNEY SPEARS: “Because we were rich. My old pa used to say to me, “Money doesn’t buy you happiness, son”

FIRST LOUISIANAN: “Aye, ‘e was right”

BRITNEY SPEARS: “I was happier then and I had everthin’. We used to live in this massive new house with great big chandeliers in the roof”

SECOND LOUISIANAN: “House! You were lucky to live in a house! We used to live in one mansion, all three of us, loads of furniture, more floor space than South Carolina…”

THIRD LOUISIANAN: “Eh, you were lucky to have a mansion! We used to have to live in a palace!”

Note: Everyone who live in Louisiana is like Sarah Schilling apart from Britney Spears and those fancy dan Kentuckians…



Posted: 12th, January 2008 | In: Celebrities, Tabloids Comment (1) | TrackBack | Permalink