Randy Newman Was Right About Short People

IT was Randy Newman who fist alerted us to the dangers of Short People.

Following Anorak’s news that Short People Are Robbing Swedish Travellers, the Sun sees how little people reacts to an open window.

Amid talk of “tiny tea-leaves” hiding in luggage and being smuggled into the holds of coaches, readers see one Phil Holden.

Mr Holden, 31, is 4ft 6inches high. As such, the Sun’s writer should know what to expect. And sure enough the small person is soon pictured secreting himself inside a suitcase.
The Sun’s unsuspecting hack then pushes the bag onto a bus.

“Once on board, Phil steps from the case to rifle through passengers’ belongings,” says the caption to another still.

In the final instalment, we read: “He shows off his ill-gotten gains.”

As a result of this, Anorak petitions the Government to ban all persons beneath a certain height from public transport.

The system works well with dodgem cars and there is every reason to believe can work in the grown-up world…

Anorak

Posted: 24th, January 2008 | In: Tabloids Comment | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed: RSS 2.0 | TrackBack | Permalink