Tabloid Bingo With The Securitas Robbers

‌IN today’s edition of Tabloid Bingo, we take a look at the Secuitas Robbery gang.

Five men are sent down. One man not present in court is suspect Sean Lupton, aged 42. He is belived to have fled the country. Also missing is £32million of the £53million stolen.

The five have been sent down for 70 years, says the Express. Seventy years, says the Sun. The Mirror hears the echo, does the maths and says: “Securitas gang jailed for a total of 140 years.”

They will each serve at least half that total, which is - fag packet, pencil, wet finger - 70 years.

The Mail says Michelle Hogg, who gave evidence against the gang has a £7million price on her head.

The Guardian realises the danger and in its front-page teaser hides Hogg’s eyes beneath a strip of black. In case Ms Hogg is adopting that disguise, another picture has her eyes covered by an orange strip, so to confuse the bounty hunters.

The Mail publishes a shot of her full face, preferring not to put a mask or pennies on her eyes…

Anorak

Posted: 30th, January 2008 | In: Tabloids Comments (2) | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed: RSS 2.0 | TrackBack | Permalink