A Shed Load Of Tears For Randy The Bigamist

“BIGAMIST rumbled by a guest from both weddings,” reports the Mail.

Randolf Edge is marrying Patience Carey.

The paper provides the ages – un-blushing Randalf is 54, his bride is 21. They began dating in 2004, when Patience was 17.

Randalf, Randy if you must, is stood at the King’s Lynn Register Office, Norfolk. All of Patience’s family are in attendance. They hear Randalf declare himself single.

But a guest is not so certain. He recognises Randalf from a past marriage, a betrothal between the groom and Helen Winkle (BBC), Edna Winkle (Sun) – are they the same person?

Bigamy. A call to the authorities. A report. A judge – “Do not treat anyone with this kind of disdain again.” Patience is gone. Randalf has a 12–month supervision order. Randalf is back with this first wife.

It’s a good story. But it is about to be made great.

Patience’s father appears. “I am not amused,” he tells the Mail.

“It has been a great shock. I just wish I could sit in my shed until it all goes away.”

(Somebody fetch me a cymbal…)

* The name in the above story have not been altered

Anorak

Posted: 13th, February 2008 | In: Tabloids Comment (1) | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed: RSS 2.0 | TrackBack | Permalink