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Prince Harry Earns His Promotion To Bikini Blast

by | 3rd, March 2008

prince-william-harry1.jpgONE man’s pay packet is the nation’s front-page news as the Mirror leads with: “£11 RISE FOR HARRY.”

Young Prince Harry Baseball Cap has been promoted to the rank of Lieutenant and seen his wages rocket by £11 a day.

A look over the menu at Mayfair’s Mahiki venue reveals that Harry can afford one daily glass of Moh’hee’toh (£10.50) as the sun sets over the yard arm, with enough spare change for a toilet wallah’s tip.

Save up and it’s a Bikini Blast (£22) restorative. And save harder still for a Mahiki Treasure Chest (£100), “the one the generals drink.”

“Will he ever see action again?” asks the Mail on its cover. Well, if he drinks enough Harry may feel a little punchy, and the paparazzi may care to step back.

On closer inspection, it turns out the Mail is talking of Harry’s war record and wondering if her will make a return to the front line.

What’s Next For Harry? 

Given the secrecy levels afforded to his last deployment, it is unlikely the Mail will be able to form a definitive answer. So we wonder. “What’s next for Harry?” asks the Mirror.

Well, Mahiki doesn’t open until 5.30 this Saturday, so we’d place our money on a trip to Boujis (Evens). Killing a Stag (3-1). Hooking up with Chelsy and going on holiday (8-11). Or following in his mother’s footsteps and starting a new life in Bahrain (5-1).

Expert opinion is needed. So the Mail invites Royal Raspberry James Whitaker to suggest Harry will stay in the Army. And someone called Malcolm Dawkins says Harry should settle in South Africa. Harry, it turns out, is the same age as Dawkins’ son Ross who is studying wine-making at Stellenbosch University near Cape Town, and making his dad proud.

It’s an idea. Especially if the college does a course on cocktail making…



Posted: 3rd, March 2008 | In: Royal Family, Tabloids Comments (3) | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed: RSS 2.0 | TrackBack | Permalink