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Anorak | Niqab, Kebab And Stab: Welcome To Dewsbury Theme Park

Niqab, Kebab And Stab: Welcome To Dewsbury Theme Park

by | 28th, May 2008

dewsbury.jpg WHO dares go to Dewsbury?

Don’t rush to make a decision. When Shannon Matthews was found, and her family members arrested, police handed out leaflets telling locals not to “jump to any conclusions about people who may be involved in this inquiry”.

As if anyone would do that. Don’t be hasty. Listen to the travel advice.

The Times would like to tell you in “Dewsbury: Kidnap, lynching and a suicide” that “The savage beating to death of a 17-year-old boy was merely the latest in a grim litany of incidents in this West Yorkshire town.”

Know that: “It is fast becoming the town that dare not speak its name.”

Andrew Norfolk dares to go to (place hand over mouth) Dwsbrrryyy. “A steady rain fell on Dewsbury yesterday morning, but it would take a biblical flood to wash away the stains that discolour this once-proud Yorkshire mill town.”

Lots of animals in Dewsbury, many of them in human form, but you’d be hard pressed to find two worth saving and placing on a breeding programme to repopulate the drowned town with Noah Dewsbury.

The Dewsbury guide book says that Amar Aslam has been murdered. He was “a quiet, shy boy”, and so, one would suppose an

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Posted: 28th, May 2008 | In: Broadsheets Comments (6) | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed: RSS 2.0 | TrackBack | Permalink