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Anorak | Amy Winehouse Hoovers Up Alex Haines

Amy Winehouse Hoovers Up Alex Haines

by | 28th, May 2008

amy-winehouse-and-friend.jpgAMY Winehouse mum Janis is said by the Mirror to be delighted her daughter has been stepping out with one Alex Haines.

Mum should take care not to order the wedding invites just yet, because Amy is already married, and bigamy may see the Sun achieve its goal of getting the chanteuse jailed. Oh, and the Mail says Amy is dating Alex Haynes.

Over such seemingly small things the tabloid press deliberates. And now the Mirror says this Alex whatshisname has been, allegedly, caught smoking crack.

Know that: “Amy’s camp were said to be stunned when they got wind that he had been caught on camera taking drugs.”

No small shock to discover that your associate has been keeping a stash back for himself and not sharing it around. Anorak’s T-EEM Street urban dance troop tells us that Alex should now be called Alex Bogart and “taxed”.

A source claims: “Alex was supposed to help her and he crossed the line. He had to go.”

It’s all part of Winehouse’s spring clean. In “Hoovering Winehouse cleans up her act,” says Metro, London’s free newspaper (“Soaking up seat seepage for Tube dwellers for a generation!”). It spots Winehouse vacuuming her driveway.

What seems like a euphemism proves to be correct as the Mail, or at least partially so, as the Mail says Winehouse is not hoovering but “dumping”.

Her Hoover has broken and is no longer fit for purpose. It should be replaced , possibly by team of cosmetic surgeons…

Picture: Amy Winehouse and friend in happier times



Posted: 28th, May 2008 | In: Celebrities, Tabloids Comment | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed: RSS 2.0 | TrackBack | Permalink