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Anorak | Big Brother 9: Vanessa’s Arse About Face And Davina’s Dead Mum

Big Brother 9: Vanessa’s Arse About Face And Davina’s Dead Mum

by | 31st, May 2008

big-brother-sick-bucket.jpgBIG Brother 9 Watch – Anorak’s look at Big Brother in the news…

The show is almost upon us, and tabloid hacks prepare for lazy days at the keyboard, hitting F6 and letting the news write itself.

With days until the opening of Big Brother 9 – the show looms like a holidaymaker over a Faliraki toilet bowl – the papers are building to the drama. Look out for Chanelle’s arse and Davina McCall’s dead relatives…

DAILY STAR (front page): “BIG BRO – CHANELLE BIG BRO’S SEXIEST BABE EVER”

The Star resits all urges to add an “OFFICAL” tag to this headline news, but who can argue with the view of Vanessa Feltz, who observes: “A pair of peaches? No, it’s Chanelle Hayes’ pert bum cheeks, silky smooth, peeking out of the side of some tiny lace pants and pointing right at me.”

Rude in some cultures, but poking your arse in Vanessa’s face is just what she likes best.

Posing, pouting, thrusting her bottom towards the lens, Chanelle looks every bit the consummate professional. She’s cool, calm and in control.

Vanessa wonders:

Was she prepared for the public’s reaction when she quit the house early? “I thought I’d be so hated, I’d have to leave the country. I was thinking of fleeing to Spain. I was dreading facing the world.

“It’s a terrible feeling when you’re only 19 and you imagine you’re the most despised woman in the United Kingdom.”

Instead of hatred, she found a career.

THE SUN: “Chanelle’s breast BB babe”

The top three ladies from our BB sexiest poll are as follows …
Chanelle Hayes 29%
Imogen Thomas 24%
Kate Lawler 13%
Talk about breast bits!

DAILY MAIL: “At war with her family, shunning her mother’s funeral, and dumping her agent: Davina’s mid-life crisis

Now Florence is dead, though, Davina feels curiously positive. She has told friends she feels as if a weight has been lifted from her shoulders.

‘Davina feels her mother’s death is a chance for a new beginning,’ said a close associate. ‘It is almost as if she is glad it’s all over. She can’t be let down or hurt any more.’

GLASGOW DAILY RECORD: “Good luck Davina,” says Kay Adams.

I can’t help thinking you’ll be looking forward to the start of Big Brother 9 on Thursday like a hole in the head but you are, at least, putting a brave face on it. Apparently, she tells us, there is going to be much more “suffering” this time around.

And Davina knows all about suffering…



Posted: 31st, May 2008 | In: Tabloids, TV & Radio Comments (5) | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed: RSS 2.0 | TrackBack | Permalink