Comments on: Islamic Terrorists Audition For Dirty Dozen In British Jail

By: magnetite

magnetite — Tue, 30 Sep 2008 00:20:03 +0000

I’m all for them building new prisons, but I’m not sure that giving them superpowers is such a good idea. The government has a bit of a problem keeping stuff safe and secret, so they’re bound to leave the substance that turns Superprison evil when he’s near it on the train or in Starbucks. A quick montage of it being passed from hand to hand until it ends up in Osama’a supervillain hideout in Somewhereistan. Two weeks later and we’re all hoping for Superprison’s sidekick, Mighty Joe Young Offender’s Institution to save the day - or at least stop him splattering people with his giant arms, better known as C and D wings.

By: firestar

firestar — Mon, 29 Sep 2008 15:32:33 +0000

in my opinion, this is a case for sue Thomas FB Eye if ever i saw one.

that way she wouldn’t hear all the bollocks being talked by the Star.

By: firestar

firestar — Mon, 29 Sep 2008 15:30:25 +0000

wasn’t the last ‘time bomb’ a british terrorist lit still attached to his feet?

By: chenier

chenier — Mon, 29 Sep 2008 11:45:19 +0000

Yep; they had to call off the frozen prawn caper after some buffoon accidentally mixed in half a ton of cocaine instead of the semtex…

By: Jack McJiggins

Jack McJiggins — Mon, 29 Sep 2008 11:40:21 +0000

‘Lieutenant Ellen L. Ripley will save us!’

Indeed! Walking round prisons in her knickers will put all the terrorists into a coma and save us all…mmmm.

By: Jack McJiggins

Jack McJiggins — Mon, 29 Sep 2008 11:39:26 +0000

I’ve never seen a kettle of sardines before. Perhaps the terrorists are smuggling in fish filled with plastic explosives in order to break out.

By: chenier

chenier — Mon, 29 Sep 2008 11:35:21 +0000

Alcohol works well, though, if you value your life, don’t provide ambrosia to Artemis.

She hates the bloody stuff.

I object to being doomed because hacks can’t even grasp that you don’t light a time bomb, due to the fact that there is nothing to light.

If home sapiens goes out in a blaze of glory, kenning things which we are not meant to ken, that’s one thing.

I’m not keen on the prospect, but at least there is a blaze.

Going out with a whimper as the last celebrity reality show tanks the planet is another kettle of sardines…

By: Elvera

Elvera — Mon, 29 Sep 2008 11:34:16 +0000

‘Even so, we’re all doomed for one reason or another. Does it make a difference what it is anymore?’
—————————————————————————
Don’t worry - Lieutenant Ellen L. Ripley will save us!

By: Jack McJiggins

Jack McJiggins — Mon, 29 Sep 2008 11:23:56 +0000

I was worried about the Anorakian Goddesses “taking me out” if I cackled too much. Whether they’d take me out with a sniper rifle or take me out to the local cafe, I daren’t ask.

Even so, we’re all doomed for one reason or another. Does it make a difference what it is anymore?

By: chenier

chenier — Mon, 29 Sep 2008 11:16:31 +0000

I must say, you are a little conservative on the insane cackling front, but my expectations may be a tad inflated.

I’m confessing to 3,284 offences of abusing Usenet …

By: Jack McJiggins

Jack McJiggins — Mon, 29 Sep 2008 11:12:09 +0000

We’ll be doomed if the LHC goes to full power at the same instant. Mwuhaha.

By: chenier

chenier — Mon, 29 Sep 2008 11:01:22 +0000

“light a time bomb”

Read that over again

“light a time bomb”

We’re doomed…

By: Jack McJiggins

Jack McJiggins — Mon, 29 Sep 2008 10:52:39 +0000

‘placing the terror lags in one jail “would light a time bomb could destroy Britain”‘

Are Bin Laden’s Boyz now so sophisticated that they can collectively metamorphose into one big bomb when they are all within a square mile of each other?