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The A To Z Of Celebrity Illnesses

by | 1st, October 2008

READING this week’s OK! is to venture into the A to Z of Celebrity Diseases.

Victoria Beckham would like OK! readers to know: “I HATE LOOKING AT MYSELF IN THE MIRROR.”

For such reasons does Her Poshness appear in magazines and thereby gets to see herself in glossy print.

Natasha Hamilton, a singer, tells us about “MY DEVASTATING MISCARRIAGE”. Although she pulled herself together to watch Disney’s On Ice Finding Nemo, which the kids “loved”.

And Girl Aloud singer Nadine Coyle tells us:

“I kept getting ill, coming out in cold sores with the stress. Then a found a lump in my breast.”

And? And it wasn’t cancer. But it could have been. It could have been a piece of gristle. But it could have been cancer. And Nemo could have died.

At each turn the reader is challenged to sympathise. Never mind the talent, or lack of it, get a load of the pain on that. But with each installment, we grow more hardened, our heart more calloused.

Before long we are like a Danish man looking at increasing amounts of porn before he can hit the marital hay.

Amateurs are crying on the X Factor, sobbing about their dear old mum, their muddy-faced kiddies, their chronic illness. And the professional celebs are so insecure that they respond by rolling up their trouser legs to show off their nasty grazes (severed limbs), their cancer scares (fatty deposits), their bi-polar depression (or is it clinical?).

One day a celebrity will tell us that when they disappeared from view they had died but it only thanks to the fans and the kids and their new range of invigorating scents and shower gels that they found the courage to go on…



Posted: 1st, October 2008 | In: Celebrities, OK! Comment (1) | TrackBack | Permalink