Five Ways To Beat The Credit Crunch
FIVE Ways To Beat The Credit Crunch:
1. Turn the volume down on your transister whenever BBC business man Robert Peston comes on air.
2. Forgo mortgage payments and end up living in a small hotel near a train station, room paid for by the DSS.
3. Wean yourself off expensive crack cocaine and smack by visiting the doctor and telling him your feel depressed, are possibly bi-polar and spend all day crying. Free upper and downers for life.
4. Own-brand supermarket beer might only be thrupence a bottle but it still is expensive when compared with muddy water laced with urine samples imported from Beijing.
5. Sell the TV and save money on your licence fee by create your own BBC by calling everyone a plonker and ranting about why the football is on f***** cable.
More to follow…
Posted: 16th, October 2008 | In: Money Comments (6) | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed: RSS 2.0 | TrackBack | Permalink
Comments
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October 16th, 2008 at 3:41 pm
Date or marry a Premiership footballer save personal expense and lessen the pain of shopping by spending somebody else’s money!
October 16th, 2008 at 3:34 pm
Make sure you have absolutely no talent whatsoever! Phone Max Clifford and just trust him to do the rest!
October 16th, 2008 at 3:33 pm
‘1. Turn the volume down on your transister whenever BBC business man Robert Peston comes on air.’
If you read his website I suspect he may prefer to be crunched by Weedough Spanky! No credit accepted but Weedough is little Cash.
‘I hurt myself today
To see if I still feel
I focus on the pain
The only thing that’s real’
October 16th, 2008 at 3:26 pm
Why not take out several credit cards and use a third party to consolidate all your debt into one low, affordable, monthly payment.?
October 16th, 2008 at 3:15 pm
Another one! Become the new John Prescott, pretend you’re working class and get paid lots of money for acting out that pretence. Please bring own croquet mallet!
October 16th, 2008 at 2:54 pm
neglect your kids, or even do away with them and then sue anyone who mentions it