12 Gay Premier League Footballers Named
So says the Daily Star. The front-page outing is illustrated by a mugshot of strapping hetero Sol Campbell and a picture of Abby Clancy, who as a jobbing Wag must be considering a sex change to keep her career intact and open to offers.
Says the Star:
At least 12 top Premier League football stars are secretly gay. The superstar dozen are even scared to confess their homosexuality to their team-mates.
Anorak can reveal that the 12 are collectively known as…
…Tottenham Hotspur, and the lads should be wary of coming out to their Neolithic fans who remain stuck in the 1960s.
At a forum to launch an anti-homophobia campaign, pundit and ex-England Under-21 star Paul Elliott, 44, said he knew 12 top current players who were gay.
Paul Elliot used to play for Chelsea. He knows 12 gay footballers. Not that he is gay. He just knows at least 12 footballers who are.
What a bizarre news story? Are we expected to guess who they are? Or are they expected to show themselves and makes us all feel better about how liberal and understanding we are?
PS: The Young Boys of Berne play in the Wankdorff stadium…