The 12 Most Wanted Least Wanted Football Chants And Chanters
GOOD news that two Spurs fans have been arrested for aiming homophobic chants at Portsmouth Town footballer Sol Campbell.
In all 16 suspects have been caught on camera singing songs about the player.
And once these are dealt with, the police will round up any and all other sick-midned fans. The 12 Most Wanted Least Wanted Football Chants And Chanters (NSFW):
Do you know the fans who…:
Accuse David Beckham of sodomy:
Does she take it up the ****?
Accuse Wayne Rooney and the Rooneys of incest:
“Your sister is your mother, your father is your brother, you sleep with one another, the Rooney family
Accuse Liverpool fans of animal abuse:
“Park, Park, Where ever you may be
You eat dogs in your country
it could be worse
You could be scouse
Eating rats in your council house”
Accuse former Liverpool player Jari Litmanen of cruelty to fish:
We’ve got joy we have fun, we’ve got Jari Litmanen,
He’s got Style, he’s got flair,
Got a mullet, we don’t care
Slam equal opportunities in the football community:
im blind
im deaf
i wanna be a reff
Foment terror and know the whereabouts of the world’s most wanted man:
osama woahh osama woahh hes hiding in kabul he supports the arsenal…
Libel Liverpool:
You are a Scouser,
An ugly Scouser,
You’re only happy,
On Giro day.
Your mum’s out thieving,
Your dad’s drug-dealing,
So please don’t take my hubcaps away.
Accuse Jesus (a Jew!) of being anti-Semitic:
“Away in a manger, no crib for a bed, the little lord jesus looked up and he said… F*CK OFF TOTTENHAM, F*CK OFF TOTTENHAM”
Make light of mental illness, and are tallist and abuse parents:
He’s tall he’s mad
He dances like your dad
Peter Crouch
Engage in pimping:
Oh Owen Hargreaves
you are the love of my life,
Oh Owen Hargreaves
I’d let you shag my wife,
Oh Owen Hargreaves,
I want curly hair too!
Are Homo-phobiac and very possibly libellous:
Accuse Eduardo of shagging a Beatle:
Eduardo ooohhhhhhh
Eduardo oooohhhhhh
He used to have the skills
He walks like Heather Mills
All fans will be rounded up and teams ordered to play behind closed doors…
Posted: 11th, December 2008 | In: Key Posts, Sports Comments (8) | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed: RSS 2.0 | TrackBack | Permalink
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December 14th, 2008 at 4:01 am
Who could forget the cheer of the Norfolk, Virginia High School?
We don’t smoke!
We don’t drink!
Norfolk!
Norfolk!
Norfolk!
December 12th, 2008 at 11:00 am
We used to chant that at our Deputy head, Mr Atkinson when we were in the lunchtime crowd and had the anonymity. That was about 20 years back.
He’s Bald,
He’s bent,
His arse is up for rent, Atkinson! (clap clap) Atkinson!
He’s Bald,
He’s Queer,
He’s had it up the rear, Atkinson! (clap clap) Atkinson!
Mr Atkinson wore a toupee, you see…
Forgotten the player it was meant for (and it was meant for a specific player), but it’s an 80s chant, I’ve heard.
December 12th, 2008 at 3:32 am
The only one we all sang when we were little (no one I know would sing a football chant after age 15) was :
He’s gay, he’s bent, his arse is up for rent…. (name of footballer)….
I’ve no idea who he played for but all the kids sang it no matter what team they supported… maybe (us being idiot posh kids) he didn’t exist…
December 11th, 2008 at 9:25 pm
Who’s that dying on the runway?
Who’s that dying in the snow?
It’s Matt Busby and his boys
making such a fucking noise
coz they can’t get their aeroplane to go!
December 11th, 2008 at 7:15 pm
The famous Tottenham Hotspur went to Rome to see the Pope,
The famous Tottenham Hotspur went to Rome to see the Pope,
The famous Tottenham Hotspur went to Rome to see the Pope,
And this is what he said;
FUCK OFF!
Generic chant about your team and glory to them.
Postiga, woo-oh,
Postiga, wo-o-ooh,
He came from Portugal,
And then he did fuck all.
My old man, said be an Arsenal Fan,
I said Fuck off, bollocks, your a cunt…
Oh Graham Poll,
Is a fucking arsehole,
Is a fucking arsehole.
So you’re undefeated,
That’s what you like to believe,
but you got,
Done by Chelsea at old Highbury…
He’s fat,
He’s Scouse,
He’ll rob your fucking house,
Wayne Rooney (clap clap) Wane Rooney…
Same old Crespo, always offside
Same old Chelsea, always cheating
Wayne Rooney eats bananas with his feet,
Wayne Rooney eats bananas with his feet,
Wayne Rooney eats bananas,
Rooney eats bananas,
Wayne Rooney eats bananas with his feet
When your in ro-ow Z,
and the ball hits your head,
that’s - Ronaldo…
With his cheeky grin and his packet of sweets… (that’s enough, ed)
December 11th, 2008 at 1:39 pm
Not too bad compared to some of the rugby songs I drunkenly bellowed in my youth.
Standing on the bridge at midnight was a favourite of mine I remember…
December 11th, 2008 at 10:37 am
Sadly no longer with us…..
Cheer up Roy Keane
Oh what can it mean
To a dog walking Paddy
And his shit football team
At least I think it was dog walking
December 11th, 2008 at 10:28 am
‘He’s fat, he’s French, he’s always on the bench, CANTONA!’