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The 12 Most Wanted Least Wanted Football Chants And Chanters

by | 11th, December 2008

GOOD news that two Spurs fans have been arrested for aiming homophobic chants at Portsmouth Town footballer Sol Campbell.

In all 16 suspects have been caught on camera singing songs about the player.

And once these are dealt with, the police will round up any and all other sick-midned fans. The 12 Most Wanted Least Wanted Football Chants And Chanters (NSFW):

Do you know the fans who…:

Accuse David Beckham of sodomy:

Does she take it up the ****?

Accuse Wayne Rooney and the Rooneys of incest:

“Your sister is your mother, your father is your brother, you sleep with one another, the Rooney family

Accuse Liverpool fans of animal abuse:

“Park, Park, Where ever you may be
You eat dogs in your country
it could be worse
You could be scouse
Eating rats in your council house”

Accuse former Liverpool player Jari Litmanen of cruelty to fish:

We’ve got joy we have fun, we’ve got Jari Litmanen,
He’s got Style, he’s got flair,
Got a mullet, we don’t care

Slam equal opportunities in the football community:

im blind
im deaf
i wanna be a reff

Foment terror and know the whereabouts of the world’s most wanted man:

osama woahh osama woahh hes hiding in kabul he supports the arsenal…

Libel Liverpool:

You are a Scouser,
An ugly Scouser,
You’re only happy,
On Giro day.
Your mum’s out thieving,
Your dad’s drug-dealing,
So please don’t take my hubcaps away.

Accuse Jesus (a Jew!) of being anti-Semitic:

“Away in a manger, no crib for a bed, the little lord jesus looked up and he said… F*CK OFF TOTTENHAM, F*CK OFF TOTTENHAM”

Make light of mental illness, and are tallist and abuse parents:

He’s tall he’s mad
He dances like your dad
Peter Crouch

Engage in pimping:

Oh Owen Hargreaves
you are the love of my life,
Oh Owen Hargreaves
I’d let you shag my wife,
Oh Owen Hargreaves,
I want curly hair too!

Are Homo-phobiac and very possibly libellous:

Accuse Eduardo of shagging a Beatle:

Eduardo ooohhhhhhh
Eduardo oooohhhhhh
He used to have the skills
He walks like Heather Mills

All fans will be rounded up and teams ordered to play behind closed doors…



Posted: 11th, December 2008 | In: Key Posts, Sports Comments (8) | TrackBack | Permalink