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Susan Boyle Offered $1Million For Her Virginity

SUSAN Boyle Watch: In which Britain’s Got Talent winner-in-waiting Susan Boyle gets an offer to star in a porn film.

Kick Ass Pictures has extended an offer to overnight singing sensation Susan Boyle to lose her virginity on camera for $1 million.

It’s Britain’s Got Talent Faliraki.

Pictures: Susan Boyle Naked

Kick Ass is so confident that she will accept the offer that the company has already set up the website SusanBoyleXXX.com, where people can vote on the movie’s title (e.g. Desperately Shagging Susan, Never Been Banged), theme song (e.g. Madonna’s “Like a Virgin,” Foreigner’s “Feels Like the First Time”) and co-star, among other things.

Name: Soil Boyle; Lez Jizerables; I Dreamed A Wet Dream.
Co-stars: Ann Widdecombe; Noel Edmonds; Manchester City

Kick Ass president Mark Kulkis xxxplains his thoughts on never-been-kissed Boyle.

“The logical extension of that statement is that she’s still a virgin.”

Or she’s a hooker lookin’ for love? Or it’s an elaborate act and Boyle is called Armani Dolce, a stunna dressed in Frump Suit and fright wig looking to prove point and escape the prison of her beauty?

“We have always wanted to produce a movie in which a bona fide virgin loses her maidenhood on camera.”

Adding with no hint or irony:

“That’s a very personal, intimate moment in a woman’s life.”

Indeed:

“Doing it in front of bright lights and cameras in a San Fernando Valley studio will make it that much more special.”

You’ll never forget your first time – as it’s rushed out to DVD and then onto the web.

Porn:

Adam Sandler and Christina Ricci’s Porno Uncut
Video: One-Eyed Monster Ron Jeremy On Comedy In Porn
Gail Trimble Naked: Clever Girls That Do It With Thatcher
Coctomum: The Octomum Porn Film Gets Made (NSFW)

Susan Boyle:

Susan Boyle Lives With A Man
Demi Moore Drops Susan Boyle To Twitter Shaheen Jafargholi
Susan Boyle’s Puppy Love For Donny Osmond And Auditions For Emmerdale
Financial Markets Rally On The Susan Boyle Factor
Susan Boyle Secret Picture Gallery
Susan Boyle Watch: Susie Simple Stalked By Demi Moore And Meets Oprah Winfrey
Susan Boyle Sings On Larry King: Video
Susan Boyle Watch: Susan Meets Demi Moore And Kisses Drew Barrymore
Susan Boyle Records Cry Me A River: Video
Susan Boyle Sings Live On Anderson Cooper: Video
Susan Boyle Sings Live On American TV: Video
Video: Barack Obama On Susan Boyle
Pictures: Susan Boyle Naked
Demi Moore Twitters Susan Boyle
Video: Susan Boyle On Britain’s Got Talent
Susan Boyle Look-Alike Exposed
Susan Boyle Is Britain’s Got Talent
Susan Boyle Is Boiled Alive
Susan Boyle Sings In Her Garage
Susan Boyle To Sing At Olympics Opening Ceremony

Anorak

Posted: 20th, April 2009 | In: Celebrities, Key Posts, Susan Boyle Comments (10) | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed: RSS 2.0 | TrackBack | Permalink

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percy says:
April 29th, 2009 at 8:52 am

June…..exactly…. be a luvvie and save me a leg……

June says:
April 29th, 2009 at 8:49 am

Percy

a sort of ‘tear and share’ death?

percy says:
April 29th, 2009 at 8:46 am

…..SuBo…..is almost a saint…..a bit of all of us & everything….she even has bad hair days to prove it….so there Anokak…..Hang your head in shame, see the light & start praying for salvation….SuBo Saves.

percy says:
April 29th, 2009 at 8:42 am

If you dare to make any satirical fun out of the media’s Susan Boyle Story…..you can expect the supporters of this sham show, BGT, to be phoning in and voting for you to be thrown to the lions in front of a crowd of celeb cronies at the Coliseum…..it may be cruel but that’s l “Entertainment”.for you….and it beats dying of swine flu.