Jade Goody’s Mum Dates Boris Johnson
HAVING introduced the world to Jade Goody’s step-lover – Goody Mum Jackiey Budden’s new fella – the Sun’s Andrew Parker tells us:
THE toyboy lover of Jade Goody’s grieving mum sent his ex saucy texts behind her back — including phone snaps of his MANHOOD which he calls BORIS.
The mind is infected by a large nose emerging from a mop of blonde hairs. As for the toyboy lover, well, if you found him in your Christmas stocking you’d ask for the receipt.
The Sun told this week how Jackiey Budden, 51 — still heartbroken over the loss of her daughter to cancer — had found “pure love” with Jason Cooper, 36, after meeting him in Tenerife.
It was what Jade would have wanted.
But his former partner Sarah Stephens, 29, was stunned to receive filthy texts from Jason shortly after he began a relationship with Jackiey.
How filthy is filthy?
He sent two photos of his todger with the message: “U missin Boris?” Another text gives Sarah intimate details of what he wants her to do. Pub chef Jason wrote: “Boris needs a good **** *** u. Just busy coz got Jade’s mum here.”
Old Mr Anorak views the asterisk like a modern crossword. What is **** ***? And what of that rogue “u”?
Answers to the usual address.
Last night, Sarah warned Jackiey: “My advice is get rid of him. He’ll use and dump you like he did me.”
Or not. What of those text messages? Jason might not seem keen but Boris is up for it.
Sarah revealed the former squaddie chose the name Boris after they watched a telly show about a man who gave the name to his manhood. She said: “We’d had a few glasses of wine and I asked him if Boris was coming out to play. He has called his lad Boris ever since.”
Anyone still quivering with Boris can now struggle with “his lad”, and how it offers now end of potential disasters at school pick up time.
Jason dumped Sarah through Facebook, and has been living with former lesbian Jackiey in Los Cristianos for six weeks.
Facebook is the antithesis of dating sites. It serves to switch off romances. One day divorces will be conducted through Facebook as a quorum of friends vote “single” or “married” in matters of the heart.
Says Sarah:
“Jason’s problem is his brain short-circuits through his Boris.”
It’s what Jade would have wanted…
Posted: 12th, June 2009 | In: Celebrities Comment (1) | TrackBack | Permalink
