Katie Price To Star In Porn Film
IN “JORDAN TOPLESS ROMP ON LOVE BOAT”, the Daily Stars says that demure cosmetic surgeon Katie Price has, in the company of a man, removed her bra on a love boat.
We journey to Ibiza’s slapper and snapper theme park, where aid to masturbation Katie Price is being looked at by “Ace photographer Jeany Savage, who discovered the model more than 10 years ago”.
Says Savage:
“She’s not eating properly – you can tell by her tiny body. If she’s not careful she’ll end up like Anna Nicole Smith and Marilyn Monroe.”
Jordan will come to a tragic end just like two people who were so much more famous than she is now. Finally, at the moment of her death Jordan cracks Amewika.
What can we do to save Jordan?
Jeany fears Kate will end up pushing herself over the edge as she tries to grab the publicity she so desperately needs. Jeany added: “Kate craves fame and when she sees herself splashed across the papers it will make her do something more outrageous to carry on getting publicity. It wouldn’t surprise me if she ended up doing a porn film. She’s determined to shock and will do anything.”
Can the Star, which features news of Jordan’s topless love boat romp thus be accused of pimping?
And while the Star speculates about Katie’s state of mind and being, the Sun’s Alex West places a seashell to its ear and from a lounger on an Ibiza beach hears Jordan say:
“I can’t find a man that will take me.”
The lament is equipped with a picture of Katie Price on a smallish speedboat with a largish camera crew. She is topless, showing off her orange buoys to the world.
Jordan has been partying with a string of male models including ex Matt Peacock and Anthony Lowther. She was seen cuddling and smooching Anthony, 28, at a nightclub.
But she told fellow guests at exclusive hotel Es Vive: “You know there’s nothing going on between us. He’s just a friend. I can’t find a man.”
Lowther appears to be man, although one in the Peter Andre mould, with a smooth bulbous chest that Jordan can only envy and skin tones most associated with road traffic control.
As for the romp… well, West hears Jordan says:
“I’m randy. I need a s**g, it’s driving me mad.”
Like Anna Nicole Smith, Madonna, Susan Boyle…
Posted: 19th, June 2009 | In: Celebrities, Key Posts Comments (2) | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed: RSS 2.0 | TrackBack | Permalink
Comments
June 21st, 2009 at 12:01 pm
One can only hope she learns from Robert Maxwell.
June 19th, 2009 at 11:25 am
Could the Westminster civil servant responsible for blacking out the M.P’s claim forms please apply his/hers services to this woman! She’s a most suitable and deserving case I think you’d all agree!