Peter Andre And Alex Reid To Cage Fight For Katie Price

IN today’s Peter Andre and Katie Price missive, the Daily Star leads with a picture of Peter Andre and Alex Reid, and this headline:

“YOU’LL have your legs broken, you fag tranny.”

The story goes:

FURIOUS Peter Andre has sensationally raged at love rival Alex Reid: “You’re gonna get your legs broken!”

This is dignified Peter Andre. Go on:

The normally mild-mannered singer finally snapped in a late-night phone call as Alex refused to let him speak to his kids. Alex revealed that Peter yelled abuse at him, calling him a “druggie”, “tranny”, “fag” and “pussy”.

Hey, Pete. Steady on. Alex is taken. Find your own love interest. Pete adds:

“Hundreds of people want to break your legs!”

While the Star reports that, its sister publication, OK!, interviews Alex Reid, who is billed as a “charming and surprisingly gentle man”. Gentle Alex says he will “fight to the death to protect the woman he loves”.

Might Alex go knickers-to-knickers with Pete in a televised bout of cage fighting? OK, fair is fair. Alex would win any battle with a cage – Pete being more of a paper bag fighter. And to level things up we need a contest in which Pete can excel, something like seeing which of them can purse their lips the hardest, find a rhyme for tangerine or be dignified?

Back to Alex, who is seen enacting a karate kick in thin air over a swimming pool. Take that, air! In your face, nitrogen!

Alex then says fields a question on sex with Katie. Alex says “some things I believe should stay between a man and a woman.” Adding: “But yeah, we are both uninhibited.”

And the more we listen and look at Alex, the more we see Peter emerging. Alex has swapped the T-shirt for white shirt, open to the cleavage. His hair is slicked back. His face appears to have been less powdered in foundation than pebble-dashed by having Alex sneeze into a vat of powdered Terry’s chocolate orange.

For a man who say he won’t have cosmetic surgery and wears his battle scars with honour, Reid has a full set of uniform, neat white teeth.
Might it be..? Can it…? Might it be that Pete and Alex have a future… together?

Bring on the fight. And remembers, when we say “break”, break”…

Anorak

Posted: 15th, October 2009 | In: OK! Comments (3) | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed: RSS 2.0 | TrackBack | Permalink