I’m A Celebrity Get Me Out Of Here Sacks Katie Price
THE year is now divided into TV shows: And November means I’m a Celebrity Get Me Out Of Here!, staring Katie Price in the sack and out of a bikini.
While the BBC’s care home-focused non-dancing dance show Strictly Come Dancing – does anyone allowed to operate the remote control watch it? - ITV follows the X Factor with another hit.
The show features the following celebrities, who would once have been called “personalities” and before that “VIPs”:
George Hamilton – Does the Hollywood legends know the sun cannot reach the jungle floor? Big risk that his tan might suffer. Expects a deep mahogany giving way to light maple as the show progresses.
Sam Fox – Former Page 3 stunna, and early victim of nominative determinism. Fox by name, Fox by nature. Now looks a bit like Shakin’ Stevns crossed with Sarah Jessica Parker in Letitia Dean’s wig. Says: “Of course you’ll see me under the waterfall in my bikini. I’m really proud of my body.” And we’re proud of you, Sam.
Gina D’Acampo – Stereotypical Italian daytime TV chef. Chances of winning: Nil. Chances of waving arms about and saying “mama mia”: Dead cert.
Camilla Dallerup – From Strictly Come Dancing celebrity prop to genuine celebrity. Camilla is tall and blonde. Camilla by names, Princess Diana by legs. Should do well.
Jimmy White – Anorak all-time hero. Hours upon hours of misspent youth watching Sir James – The Whirlwind - White pot balls and then choke like a fat man swallowing a whole marrow when it mattered. Tan factor: Ghostly White.
Lucy Benjamin – Former short marker inspector in EastEnders. She shots Phil Mitchell. And no-one cared. Gino’s main love interest, mama mia, tutti-frutti.
Kim Woodburn – One half of the top TV cleaning duo, Kim will keep the camp shipshape and - with Sam Fox around - in Bristols fashion. Looks a bit like Amy Winehouse’s dad Mitch.
Colin McAllister – Straighter man to Justin Ryan’s camp snark. The telly designers will look to camp up the camp with some camp songs, camp walks and camp games. Look out for rows with lesbian Sam Fox.
Sabrina Washington – Who is she? The press release says she used to be in Misteeq with Alesha Dixon. Some say she is George Washington’s descendent and finds it impossible to tell a lie. Look of lots of straight talking and rows legitimised by the phrase “I’m just being honest” and “You’ve got to true to yourself”.
Stuart Manning – Er…? No idea so let’s just say he’s in Hollyoaks.
But of course, the big news is that Katie Price is flashing her Jordans in the jungle once more. Jordan of the Jungle is already causing a row as the Star says, “Stars gang up on bush babe” and “KATE IN FOR BUSH BASHING”.
Expect others to drop into the jungle – including anyone of Katie’s future former husbands – see them all here.
Posted: 12th, November 2009 | In: Celebrities, Key Posts Comments (14) | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed: RSS 2.0 | TrackBack | Permalink
Comments
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November 16th, 2009 at 7:49 am
Stuart Manning has made his mark as a good guy already! What a gent
November 14th, 2009 at 8:35 am
TURN HER! What the hell are you talking about? Gay women can’t be turned you fool! How dare you assume that we are all waiting for the right man to come along and cure us of our dreadful affliction. Besides Stuart Manning is clearly very gay!
November 13th, 2009 at 7:52 pm
No, damn it i didn’t know Sam Fox was gay! WOW! I don’t care anyway, i reckon that Stuart Manning will turn her! LOL!
November 13th, 2009 at 5:17 pm
What if Katie and Sam get it together?
Grumble in the jungle, if you will forgive the rhyming slang
November 13th, 2009 at 5:04 pm
Well good for Sam fox for being lesbian, that’s one less gal that Stuart will have to service. He will need a holiday after this
November 13th, 2009 at 3:58 pm
Dina - you do know that Sam Fox is gay, don’t you….? or you must be the only one who doesn’t….
November 13th, 2009 at 12:05 pm
Yes, i think it may be Yampster. I just think that there must be something about this Stuart Manning to make everyone go so nuts this early on. We’ll all end up with something in our basement
November 13th, 2009 at 10:05 am
Is ’shrine in her basement’ a euphemism?
November 13th, 2009 at 6:54 am
I think that Dina chick on this forum has a shrine to Stuart Manning in her basement! Sheez!
November 13th, 2009 at 6:53 am
I’m pretty sure you’re right mincer, i recokon it’ll be Sam Fox. Stuart Manning would make a lovely toy boy for anyone!
November 12th, 2009 at 6:41 pm
How dare they not know Stuart Manning. Believe me, after this show the whole world will know Stuart Manning! He is a god, and well sexy innit
November 12th, 2009 at 5:56 pm
I feel sorry for Stuart Manning in there, he is the only single straight guy. I bet jumping out of the plane and the bug challenge will be nothing compared to when she gets there!
November 12th, 2009 at 5:31 pm
I’m backing Stuart Manning for the win. Maybe we’ll see him fooling around with one of the girls in there as he’s the only single lad going in!
November 12th, 2009 at 11:06 am
Katie Price? I hope she’s hungry. She’s a shoo in for any task involving the consumption of antipodean genitalia in that line up. I may spend a few quid myself in the hope that she bites off more than she can chew